


Life with the Lannisters

by masterofthewhisperers



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:42:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 31,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22064209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/masterofthewhisperers/pseuds/masterofthewhisperers
Summary: This is just a series of one shots regarding everyday life of a Modern AU Lannister family. (I like Bronn being involved as well, he brings a bit of chaotic crackhead energy, so I just made him Cersei's brother as she and Jaime are not related).
Relationships: Cersei Lannister/Jaime Lannister
Comments: 93
Kudos: 74





	1. A Sky Full of Stars

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter was inspired by a story a friend was telling. We 10/10 DO NOT endorse drinking and driving. Hope you guys have a happy new year!

Jaime exited the bar, flanked by Bronn and Clegane, and wished Tyrion a good last few hours as a bachelor as he climbed in his car desperate to get home to his wife. Tyrion grabbed him before he could climb into his BMW and asked if he was good to drive. Jaime assured him he would be fine and promised to text him when he got home. They all went their separate ways; Tyrion eager to get home so he didn’t accidentally fall into bed with a random, Clegane quickly hopped in his Uber, and Jaime and Bronn jumped in together since Bronn lived four houses down from the Lannisters. 

Jaime and Bronn were cruising down the highway with the top down when Bronn drunkenly pointed out the stars. Jaime looked up and they began attempting to point out constellations. Jaime dove into a story about how his mother used to stargaze with he and Tyrion. 

“Leo was always our favorite. There is something fierce and beautiful about a lion that is so intriguing yet dangerous. Beautiful creatures, honestly,” Jaime mentioned as they drove along.

Bronn nodded his head, “When Cersei and I were younger our parents were rarely home so we made a game of who could name the most constellations, she always won. My favorite is Orion.”

“Our balcony has a great view. Cersei could still burn hours looking at the night sky.” Jaime added as both sets of eyes remained on the sky.

Both men were lost in daydreams of the past when flashing blue and red lights pulled them from their haze. Jaime quickly pulled over and an officer approached the vehicle. 

“Hello, sir. Do you know why I pulled you over tonight?”

“Uhh, because I was speeding?” Jaime asked, rather confused.

“Something like that. Do you know how fast you were going?”

“I would say like 85 or 90. My bad officer.”

“No, you weren’t going 85 or 90. A bit slower actually. Try like 20 miles per hour ON THE FREEWAY. If you guys would step out of the car. I would also like to see your ID’s.”

Jaime and Bronn slowly exited the car and handed the man their licenses. 

“Well, you guys are obviously drunk. Just sit in my car while I look over your car and run everything.”

Jaime and Bronn quickly made their way to the cop car. Jaime jumped into the front seat as Bronn took the back. 

“Shit! We are so screwed. He is two seconds away from realizing how hammered we actually are. Then he’s going to check our ID’s and find out who we are. Then somehow your father is going to find out and kill us. It’ll be a blast. This was definitely all worth it.” Bronn said anxiously. 

“We’ll be fine. Watch this,” Jaime said as the officer made his way back to his car. Jaime leaned over the drivers seat and locked the door. 

“You better unlock this damn door before I call for back up and have you both booked in the county jail.”

Jaime played with him for a bit and had the officer running around the vehicle attempting to get in while Bronn laughed hysterically in the back. After 5 minutes of torturing the officer Jaime unlocked the doors. 

“Well, I now know who both of you are. A Lannister and a Langston, Tywin’s son and his son’s brother-in-law. Here’s the deal, I won’t book you guys tonight but I’m calling your wife and she’s coming to pick you up,” the pudgy officer said pointing a finger at Jaime. 

“Please, no. For the love of god, NO. Would you book me if I ran? What if I went for your gun? Would we still have to call her? CAN YOU PLEASE JUST TAKE ME TO THE DRUNK TANK FOR THE NIGHT?!” Jaime pleaded urgently wishing to leave Cersei out of this issue.

Cersei had just gotten Tommen back to bed when her phone began vibrating. She figured it was Jaime either drunk calling her or letting her know they were on their way home. 

“Hello?”

“Hey, Cers, so a small issue. Please don’t be mad. Bronn and I got pulled over on our way home. The good news, we’re not going to jail. The bad news, he wants you to come get us,” Jaime said into the speaker with a hesitant tone.

“You cannot be serious. Tommen just fell back asleep and I refuse to wake him again. You can stay the night in jail. I’ll get your asses tomorrow.”

“No, babe, seriously. Please come get us. You HAVE to come get us. He refuses to book us. I begged him to, honestly. We’re five minutes from the house, tops. You can either call my mother or just leave Tommen, I’m sure he won’t wake up. We’re two blocks away from the house, just come get us,” Jaime begged and pleaded, not wanting to standing in the freezing cold any longer than necessary. 

“Fine. I’ll be there in 5.”

Cersei pulled up to the scene and saw Jaime and Bronn handcuffed on the sidewalk with an officer the size of Clegane laughing at them.

“Good evening, officer. I’m here to pick these idiots up.”

“Sounds good, Mrs. Lannister. Here are the keys to that beauty. Let me just get these boys uncuffed.”

“Do you think I could keep a pair of these?” Jaime asked half-jokingly.

“Oh hell no.” Cersei retorted as she grabbed both men by an ear and drug them to her vehicle. 

Jaime and Bronn were smart enough to keep their mouths shut for awhile lest Cersei pop off and kill them both with one hand on the wheel. Jaime soon decided to test his luck a bit.

"So, babe, sweetheart, lover, how are we going to get my car?" He asked as Bronn sunk down and shook his head in the backseat.

"Oh, darling, your precious car gets to sit on the side of the highway until tomorrow," Cersei answered sweetly.

"I'm sorry? What? THAT CAR IS MY BABY. THERE WERE ONLY 69 OF THEM MADE. EVER. And that one in particular is a limited edition, making it even more rare. WE CANT JUST LEAVE HER," Jaime yelled dramatically.

"If you play stupid games you win stupid prizes, Lannister. And if you do not shut the hell up you're going to wake our actual child and if you do that you can bunk at Bronn's for the next month," Cersei retorted threateningly with strong glare as they pulled into Bronn's driveway.

"Umm, well, sis, thanks for the ride. Jaime...good luck. See you all tomorrow," Bronn said as he quickly exited the vehicle. 

Cersei and Jaime remained silent until they got Tommen put back in bed and headed towards their own room.

"So, are you mad because Bronn claimed I was drunk and driving, because I got pulled over, or because you had to come pick us up?" Jaime asked rather tauntingly.

"All of the above," She said as he changed and brushed his teeth. "Firstly, if you ever drink and drive again, I'll castrate you. Secondly, HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET PULLED OVER GOING 20 MILES PER HOUR? Finally, you better praise God you asshats didn't wake Tommen up and you better hope the news doesn't get ahold of this or the wrath of your father will be far worse than anything I could ever do," she added as they both threw decorative pillows on the floor.

She climbed into bed and he hugged her tightly despite her protests, "First off, I wasn't drunk. I did have like 3 drinks but I was fine; Bronn freaked out and exaggerated. Second, the sky was full of stars and it distracted me then I started thinking about you," he added while kissing her neck, "Thirdly, thank you for coming and getting us. I am sorry and I love you."

He continued trying to kiss her deeply, until she pushed him off and rolled over.

"Cers, please?"

"Absolutely not. Go to sleep we have to be up early for Tyrion's wedding."

"So no sex?"

"No sex. GO. TO. SLEEP."

"Babe, my car."

"JAIME. GOOD. NIGHT."


	2. All of the Lights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> High School AU. All characters are roughly 17-18 years old.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Here's a long story that I decided to write instead of working on my other fic! This idea came about me while I was watching Friday Night Lights at the same time my roommate was watching One Tree Hill. I hope you enjoy this one, as for "Paging Dr. Lannister's" I intend to have another chapter posted by Sunday.

Jaime Lannister trotted off the field following a touchdown pass to his receiver, Loras Tyrell. Lannisport Prep was up by one touchdown against the North Trident Wolves. Jaime caught the eye of his head cheerleader girlfriend, Cersei Langston, and winked. 

Bronn punched him in the shoulder. “Dude, focus on finishing this game before you start imagining pegging my sister. Thanks.”

“Shut up, bro. I am focused. We have 4 minutes left in the game. Baratheon and Stark won’t properly handle the pressure our defense is throwing at them. If they can get another stop and you and I can connect on a long ball the win is sealed. On top of that, my parents being out of town means…”

“…VICTORY PARTY AT YOUR PLACE!!!!”

“Hell yeah. Tyrion already has everything set up,” Jaime added as he began telling Bronn about how much of Tywin’s money Tyrion had spent on this party

Jaime and Bronn were pulled from their party fantasy as they watched four star receiver, Ned Stark, catch a hail mary from Baratheon and drive out of bounds running right into Cersei.

Cersei had been mid-chant, half focused on the game, half thinking about how hot Jaime looked in football pants when suddenly she was on her back and the man on top of her was not Jaime. 

Ned pulled her to her feet. “I am so sorry. It was a total accident. Are you okay?”

“I am fine. Don’t touch me,” she replied as she batted his hands off her arms. He smiled at her and jogged back onto the field turning back only to wink at her. 

“Ned Stark totally just winked at you. Jaime is not going to like that.”

Cersei looked to her left and saw Jaime and Bronn both staring at her as Margaery gave voice to her inner thoughts. 

Not only had Stark tackled Cersei, but he and Baratheon had connect twice afterwards and managed to tie the game. Jaime was pissed and a bit flustered. His golden arm had managed to keep the team out of tight situations for the past three years but this time was different. 

There were two minutes left on the clock and the Lions needed to score in order to win and keep their number one ranking for playoffs. Jaime took the first snap, fifty yards from the goal line, and was able to run for five yards before getting smashed by Stannis Baratheon. 

Bronn stood over him. “Get. Up. The clock is ticking. We don’t have time for your theatrics.”

Jaime jumped up, pissed off, “Fine. We’re going full send.” 

“What? Don’t play hero and lose this.”

“Do you trust me? We’ll be fine. You run a deep route and I’ll throw a deep pass. We’ll win and then we’ll go home and party.”

Jaime Lannister took the second snap at 1 minute and 45 yards from the goal line and dropped back waiting. The Clegane brothers helped buy him time by blocking as Bronn got down field. Jaime finally pulled back and threw a floater targeted 40 yards down the field landing perfectly in Bronn’s hands. Bronn scored and the crowd went insane. There were 30 seconds on the clock as Jaime got his offense lined up for the extra point attempt. He took the snap and ran around backfield due to Addam Marbrand missing a block. Jaime saw 10 seconds on the clock and damned the play and ran it in himself. The buzzer sounded as Jaime’s teammates lifted him on their shoulders and carried him to the sidelines. 

Once again, all of the lights were shining for Jaime Lannister when he stepped out of the locker room. He shook a few hands, took a few pictures, and signed a few footballs for young fans before searching the sea of people for Cersei. He finally found her, only to realize Ned Stark and Robert Baratheon had found her first and had bravely decided to attempt to talk to her. 

They had just asked Cersei, Catelyn, and Melara to come to a northern club with them when Jaime picked Cersei up from behind and kissed her. 

“Sorry, boys. I don’t think she’ll be able to hang out at Moat Cailin with you tonight. She has some business to attend to.”

“Bloody hell, Lannister. If you’re talking about your dick and my sister I’ll kill you,” Bronn said as he clapped Baratheon and Stark on the shoulders. 

“Well that but also our little fiesta de la victoria.”

“Ahh, look who passed Spanish with a C-,” Melara said with a flirty wink.

“Wait. You jackasses are throwing a party,” Baratheon questioned Jaime, as Cersei looked Melara up and down. 

“Yeah, on Casterly Rock. You know what? You guys should come,” Cersei added still glaring at Melara while Jaime gave her an incredulous look. 

“Cers, side bar?” Jaime grabbed her elbow and pulled her off to the side, “What the hell?”

She cupped his face in her hands, “Jaime, it’ll be interesting AND it will get Catelyn off my ass about Ned, and Robert might help get Melara’s mind off of your ass.”

“Ned and Robert? You guys are on a first name basis now. Incredible,” Jaime said as he threw his hands in the air, “And from my point of view, it seemed Ned and Robert were more interested in Cersei than they were in Catelyn or Melara. 

“Well, good thing Cersei is more interested in YOU. This is minor. We are NOT fighting over this,” She argued.

“No, we’re not…at least not tonight. Tyrion just called, everything is set up and I still need to shower. Are you going to ride with me or would you rather grab a ride with Bob and Fred?” 

She slapped his shoulder, “Quit being a jackass for two seconds. I’m riding with you.” She grabbed him for a quick kiss before he went to start his car.

Cersei walked back to the group to tell them Jaime, somewhat, okayed their attendance and walked to Jaime’s vehicle while Catelyn and Melara argued over who would drive the Northerners to Casterly Rock. 

Jaime decided to take the long way home, in part to annoy Cersei and in part to avoid all the people who would definitely arrive early. Twenty minutes into their drive he decided he wouldn’t mind doing this all night as he gazed at the stars through his sunroof while holding Cersei’s hand as she sang along to The Lumineers. 

He was pulled out of his reverie by a call from Tyrion, “Hey, Captain Lannister, just need an ETA of when you are set to land at base? It’s getting a little wild over here and some randoms from North Trident just walked in with Cat and Malaria.”

Cersei laughed and met Jaime’s gaze before answering for him with a smirk, “Melara, Tyrion, try to be remotely nice. We’ll be there in 10 minutes. Captain Lannister thought he could get out of his own party by holding me hostage and driving around all night.”

“Well, you laughed at it. Anyway, I’ll try. Just get here as fast as you can. Bronn isn’t here yet either and these things are boring without you guys,” He said before hanging up.

Jaime took a deep breath before whipping a U-turn and within 15 minutes he was navigating up the long driveway. He parked his Jeep in the garage and walked in the manor behind Cersei guiding her, with his hands on her hips, to Tyrion. They eventually found Tyrion and Oberyn Martell, the Lannisport basketball shoot guarding, in the pool house beating Stannis Baratheon and Roose Bolton at beer pong. 

“Tyrion, we’re here! Now, I’m going to shower,” Jaime said with a wave before heading back to the main house. 

Cersei ran after him, “what’s your issue?”

“I wasn’t aware I had one. I’m exhausted and really need a shower. Maybe after that I’ll be normal.”

“That’s not completely what I meant. As soon as I invited Stark and Baratheon, you’ve been acting dumb weird. So what’s up? I thought you were really excited for this party?” She quietly questioned as they greeted classmates once they arrived inside the main house. 

“I still am. I just would’ve liked a small break from people and I am really not in the mood to deal with the drama that comes with Ned Stark and Robert Baratheon. And yet there they are, sitting on MY kitchen counter, drinking out of MY MOTHER’S QIANLONG VASE. Holy shit if my parents were to walk in right now they would kill every person here.”

“So that’s what it is. In partial you’re pissed at me for inviting the North Trident players but you’re really worried your parents are going to find out about this,” She said as they entered his room on the rather quiet third floor. 

He met her with a tight hug, “I’m not mad at you. I am scared my parents are going to find out. They didn’t give us an exact time they would be home, just that it could be anywhere from tonight to Sunday morning so we’re really risking it with this. And as much fear as my father puts into Tyrion and I daily our mother would make him look pleasant in comparison if she were to walk in. On top of that, I didn’t play great tonight. Yeah, we won but I know they were live streaming the game and there is no way he is pleased. I fumbled four times and got sacked, no absolutely obliterated, at the goal line twice. I’m actually surprised they haven’t called.”

“For what it’s worth, I think all the lights shine for you. I thought you played your ass off even though some plays didn’t go as planned. And, the brightside, you won and you’re still ranked number one in state, and in my heart. I love you. Now, go shower, you smell horrible.”

Jaime finally got out of the shower and changed before lounging on his bed next to Cersei. He rolled over on top of her before attacking her mouth with his. She didn’t have time to protest before her reflexes took over and she was moving in sync with him. He attempted to work his way down before she pushed him off and stood up.

“You have a house full of people, drinking to a major victory speared by you.”

He looked her up and down, “I really think I would prefer you coming back to this bed and letting me finish what I was trying to start.”

“Come downstairs with me and I’ll let you do whatever you want once everyone leaves.”

He shot her a surprised look, stood up, and allowed her to lead him downstairs. 

Downstairs they saw a crowd gathered around Joanna’s custom dining room table. They weaved their way to the front of the crowd and saw Roose and Stannis attempting to go shot for shot with Tyrion and Bronn.

Jaime moved closer in an attempt to intervene, “I’ll be right back. I need to stop those two before all hell breaks loose.” 

Cersei simply nodded and as soon as Jaime was on the opposite side of the table a hand touched her shoulder. She met the hand’s owner with hard stare. 

“Hi, I just needed to tell you that I really am sorry about tackling you earlier. Not that I didn’t mind being on top of you. I’m just sorry it was in that manner. I’m Ned by the way,” he said sheepishly before removing his hand.

“Mmm, apology accepted, I suppose. Just don’t let it happen again,” Cersei replied coolly before looking for Jaime across the room.

Stark nodded, “Yeah, yeah. Also, you have really gorgeous eyes. It’s like peering into two emeralds. You know they say the eyes are the windows to the soul.”

“Yeah, she does have beautiful eyes. A beautiful soul too, if you will,” Jaime said over Ned’s shoulder. 

“Lannister, good game tonight. It’s a shame you butchered your stats though. Our defense was just on point tonight, I guess. Or maybe you were just off your game, I’m not sure yet,” Stark quickly replied while still gazing at Cersei.

“Stark. How does it feel always coming in second? Second in state team rankings, second ranked prospect on the east coast, second to last guy Cersei would ever date; beat out only by your brute of a friend Baratheon. I suppose you get used to it after a while, huh?”

Ned spun around quickly, “Fuck off, Lannister.”

Jaime looked Ned square in the eye before launching his right fist into his nose. The whole party went silent as Stark hit the floor, Jaime’s unexpected punch knocking him out. 

Robert Baratheon looked up from across the room, “Lannister, I am going to kick your ass,” is the last thing anyone heard before a door slammed, loudly.

Everyone in attendance turned to look and saw Joanna and Tywin Lannister. 

“WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE? EVERYONE. OUT. NOW.” 

The North Trident team picked up Ned and people began filing out of the front door as Tywin cleared out the two upper levels of the house and Joanna checked the pool house, the garage, and the basement. 

Tywin met a very drunk Loras Tyrell and Renly Baratheon in his study, “Mr. Lannister, please don’t tell my grandmother. She’ll kill me. For everything, sir. I am so sorry,” Loras slurred. 

“Loras, Margaery is downstairs go straight home, play well next week, and I won’t say a thing.”

Tywin and Joanna met back in the foyer just in time to see Jaime and Tyrion attempting to make a run for it with Cersei and Bronn. 

“STOP,” Joanna commanded.

“She’s gonna kill us. She’s gonna kill us,” Tyrion chanted lowly as the four of them turned around. 

“I’m going to take a wild guess and say at least half of you are responsible for this. I am just not sure which half though, with that, I want all four of you to clean everything then meet us in Tywin’s study. Cersei, Bronn, your parents are on their way, as well.” Joanna turned on her heel and walked up the stairs with Tywin strutting after her. 

After what seemed like years, the four of them headed up stairs to find their parents.   
Jaime entered first, “Mom, Dad, Mr. and Mrs. Langston, I would like to apologize and would also like to say Cersei and I had nothing to do with this it was all Tyrion and Bronn.” 

A very drunk Bronn jumped on his back and put him in a headlock, “He’s a liar. It was all his idea and he convinced the rest of us to go along with it.”

“Sit down,” Bartholomew Langston commanded, “none of us are pleased with what took place here tonight BUT you’re teenagers, you mess up, a lot.”

“Not that we expected the mistake to be of this magnitude, a four star recruit was knocked out on my dining room floor and my Qianlong vase was in a toilet on the second floor, but things happen. Honestly, we did similar things as young adults,” Joanna added.

Tywin stepped forward, “I did no such thing as a ‘young adult’, with that being said, we expect better of all four of you. You know as well as anyone that because of who your parents are you can’t go around acting like fools. People would love to see you slip and use it against us.”

“So we have all agreed that the best way to handle this is to ground you for two weeks and have you all do volunteer hours at one of our charities,” Celeste Langston added. 

“That’s it?” Tyrion questioned, “You’re not going to kill us?”

“Don’t think I didn’t consider it,” Tywin replied sternly before moving towards the door, the other three adults following him, “we are curious though, whose idea was it?”

The three guys looked at each other before pointing to Cersei who met the adults with a nervous smile. 

Joanna gave her an impressed look, “Can’t say I saw that one coming. We don’t care how you choose to finish the night, so long as you’re up by 6 am enthusiastic and prepared to help in the soup kitchen downtown. Good night.” 

The four of them sat in the foyer in silence for a few minutes before Bronn and Tyrion left to find somewhere to pass out. Jaime turned to Cersei, “so remember earlier when I just wanted to stay in my room?”

“Yes?”

Jaime picked her up and headed in the direction of his room, “You said once everyone left we could go back and I could do whatever I wanted to you.”

Cersei rolled out of his arms mid-kiss, “Sorry, Captain, we have to be up for community service in 4 hours and since your parents are home you get to bunk with Tyrion while I take your bed. Goodnight, lover!” 

Jaime was met with a door in his face before heading to a spare room to sulk and prepare for community service.


	3. The One that (Almost) Got Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another high school AU. Takes place a few months after chapter 2. All roughly 17-18 years old.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this is a small start to the Oberyn shot some of you have been waiting for, it primarily follows Jaime around though. For this one I gathered inspo from my fav trash tv shows: Friends and Gossip Girl. Enjoy!

The One that (Almost) Got Away

The final bell of their junior year had just rang out, they were officially seniors, yet Jaime Lannister was more stressed than ever. He was constantly on weekend trips to colleges for football showcases and he had an eight-week apprenticeship this summer at the Columbia learning hospital, it was his chance to do something without help from Tywin or Joanna. Cersei was taking two months to follow her parents around the world as they traveled with doctors without borders. Bronn and Tyrion had both opted to stay home and “protect the home base”, meaning they intended to waste three months partying and playing from New York to California. 

Jaime was leaned against his Jeep lost in thought when a voice pulled him out of his thoughts, “Hey, Jaime, I saw you were also on the high school internship list at Columbia hospital! I got accepted for the nursing fellowship; I’m really glad someone I know will be there,” Melara Hetherspoon said while walking behind Cersei.

“Oh my gosh, yeah, Jaime! Isn’t that great? You and Melara will get to spend every day together for eight weeks!” Cersei sarcastically added with a snarky smirk. 

Jaime raised his brows at her open jealousy, “Well, it could be you and I but someone decided to travel the world and work on projects in conflict zones with her parents.” 

Melara smiled throughout Cersei and Jaime’s stare off, “I am headed off! Jaime, I guess, I’ll you Monday bright and early! Cersei, have great fun this summer. I’m sure the experience will be worth missing time with your friends,” she added rather backhandedly. 

Cersei and Jaime climbed into his vehicle before silently heading in the direction of Cersei’s house. Langston Estates, while not as big as Casterly Rock, was massive. Jaime felt small every time he pulled through the black gates and this time was no different. 

He put the car in park and took a deep, nervous breath, “Cers, we need to discuss something.”

She met his nervous breath with an annoyed sigh and beat him to his point, “I think I know where this is going. These past few months we have both been so busy with life, our separate lives, college applications, applying for internships, we really haven’t actually been present with each other.”

He grabbed her hands, “Exactly. I love you. Don’t get me wrong; you are hands down the love of my life. You’re my person, but I think maybe we should…take a break? Nothing final, it’s just a little separation to grow. It gives us until the end of June to come into ourselves. We should definitely stay in communication though, for the sake of this, of us,” Jaime said all of this quickly and almost inquisitively as though he weren’t entirely sure this was a great idea. 

“Agreed. Agreed. While were on the break, maybe we should see other people, as well, for experimental purposes, of course,” She said confidently.

He looked at her with wide eyes and hesitantly said, “Umm, I wasn’t going to go that far, but sure.”

She quickly realized her dating around was not part of his plan, “I mean…this ‘break’ was YOUR idea. You cannot expect me to remain alone for two months abroad while you’re at home getting all the ass you want,” She noted aggressively before jumping out of the passenger seat, “I guess I’ll see you in two months.”  
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Jaime sat at the intro to his internship but all he could think about was how his talk with Cersei had not gone the way he intended it to. While a break was a good idea, they had practically been dating since kindergarten, her hanging out with someone else bothered him. He knew her family was on the same traveling schedule as the Martell’s, which definitely meant trouble because Oberyn has had a massive crush on Cersei since the 7th grade, when he first moved to New York. 

Days turned into weeks with the internship and he found himself liking it less and less. He really wanted to be in the Hamptons or at Casterly Rock playing video games with Tyrion and Bronn, hell he would even take running routes with Loras Tyrell over being trapped here. While he has always wanted to be a doctor and definitely still wants to, it just isn’t as fun without his people here. Melara really wasn’t helping matters either; she kept flinging herself at him and even went as far as telling other interns that they were dating. 

Melara was raising hell and spreading rumors about him at work. Cersei wasn’t calling him back or replying to any of his messages. His dad was pissed at him for choosing an apprenticeship at Columbia over simply following him around for a few weeks. His mother was mad he decided to “take a break” with Cersei. To top it all off, Tyrion and Bronn were sitting on a yacht in California right now soaking up the sun and sending him snapchats of it. The only bright side is that it was finally June 20th, which meant in 2 days he was done with this internship and in 4 days Cersei would be home and they could end this stupid break. 

Once he got off work, he decided to walk back to his loft. He took his time and decided he would check Instagram, hoping to see a snap shot of Cersei’s life somewhere. Fortunately, she had posted her first picture of the summer 5 hours ago. Unfortunately, it was a picture of her in the red two-piece swimsuit he loved with Oberyn Martell hugging her from behind as they played in the water. It was captioned “you light up my day, my personal sun.” Vance Joy, Jaime was pissed; she only listened to Vance Joy with him. It was their thing. She was only supposed to take cute couple pictures with him. Again, it was their thing.

Instead of throwing his phone across the street like he wanted to, he decided to call her one more time. Her location on the picture said Mexico; she should be able to answer then. It rang five times before he got an answer, “Hello?”

“Cers?”

“Jaime? Hey, how are you? How’s the internship?”

“Wow, it’s nice to hear your voice. The internship is okay, I guess. Kind of regretting not doing something else, but it’s a little late for that. How is saving lives across borders?”

“Oh my gosh! It has been incredible! I have met so many different people and have come to appreciate so many different cultures. I really wish you would’ve came, you would’ve loved it!”

“Yeah, I really miss-,” he was cut off by her laugh.

“Oberyn, stop. I’m talking to Jaime. Jaime who? My friend Jaime Lannister. Your point guard, Jaime Lannister. Quarterback, the man, the myth, the legend, Captain Jaime “Golden Arm” Lannister.”

“Oh righttt, that Jaime Lannister. Tell him I said ‘hi’.”

This all caught Jaime off guard, ‘my friend Jaime Lannister’, “Hey, Cers, I really need to get some food and head to bed. My last two days will be rough. Do you think we could have lunch when you get back?” 

“Yeah, we totally can! Also my parents are hosting a dinner with yours and the Martells when we get back, we can hang there! Good luck on your last two days. Bye!”

Jaime sprinted up to his room and slammed the door. He slid to the ground and ran his hands through his hair. She said her friend Jaime Lannister. Her FRIEND. He also recalled how rushed she seemed to get off the phone. Jaime screwed up and he knew it.   
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

While the hours seemed to pass slowly, the days went by rather quickly and Jaime soon found himself putting a bowtie around his neck for a formal dinner with the Langstons and the Martells. Tyrion and his parents had left about an hour ago, wanting to converse with Bartholomew and Celeste before the Martells showed up, Tywin was not particularly fond of them. Jaime was not aware of how much time had passed until Tyrion, Bronn, and Cersei had a messaged him asked where he was. He stared at the phone and contemplated not even going; surely Bronn and Tyrion could entertain themselves while Cersei kept herself busy with Oberyn. That thought quickly passed when he realized his father would definitely kill him, so he headed to the Langstons. 

“Tyrion, I talked to him three days ago. He said he would be here.”

“Cersei, chill out. I talked to him three minutes ago, he’s nearly here.”

The two of them and Bronn were hiding out in the library wing of the manor when Jaime decided to make his appearance, “I leave for eight weeks and you guys decide to take up residence in a dusty library.” 

Cersei gave him a long look and a small smile, “I was absent, it was Tyrion’s idea,” she retorted coolly.

“Right, you picked up residence with Oberyn Martell for eight weeks instead. Pardon my lapse in memory,” Jaime said with an eye roll and a snort before turning to Bronn and Tyrion, completely brushing Cersei off. 

Bronn and Tyrion both observed the situation with caution before standing, “Ya know, I think Tyrion and I have some where to be. Like anywhere else,” the two quickly made their exit leaving Cersei and Jaime in a standoff. 

“What the hell?”

He spun around quickly, “I could ask you the same thing. I completely accept you dating other people, but Martell? You couldn’t have dated anyone else? It had to be him.”

“Firstly, you’re the one who suggested we go on a ‘break’ whatever the fuck that is supposed to mean. Secondly, I WAS actually excited to see you so we could discuss the ‘break’ but I’m not too sure about that anymore. Thirdly, I’m not dating Martell, you idiot.”

He gave a cold chuckle, “You’re not dating Martell? I don’t believe you. What was the ‘you’re my personal sun’ shit then? That sounded pretty damn couple-y to me. Plus you ignored me every time I messaged you. You told Martell I was ‘just your FRIEND Jaime Lannister’.”

At this point the two of them were standing toe to toe. Cersei leaned in, close enough for him to feel her breath on his lips, and whispered, “That was the point, jackass. Are you jealous?”

She left him standing the middle of the room, stunned. She spent the summer ignoring him, making him miss her more and more everyday, had him thinking she was messing around with Martell; the player had been played. He had always known Cersei was his match in every way but she took the bar to another level with this. He was pissed but impressed. 

The Martells had arrived and dinner was being served when Jaime entered the dining area, there was one seat opened and it happened to be directly across from Cersei who was sitting next to Oberyn. The dinner went off without a hitch, but then dessert was served and Joanna asked Cersei and Oberyn about their experiences this summer.

Oberyn grabbed Cersei’s hand and kissed it, “Well, aside from spending the summer gallivanting with this dime, the cultural experience was astonishing. I also got to follow Dr. Langston around in Haiti. Watching him work was incredible, I learned so much!”

Cersei smirked at Jaime before giving Joanna a full smile, “Joanna, it was hands down the best experience of my life. I met so many incredible doctors, who sacrifice their time and their lives for this,” she looked directly at Jaime before finishing, “but I learned just as much from Oberyn this summer as I did the doctors, he was a great traveling partner and very well versed in worldly topics.”

Joanna had a general idea Cersei was saying most of this to get a reaction out of Jaime so she smiled and played along, “Cersei, that is great to hear! I’ve been told Oberyn is very cultured, I’m happy that benefitted you two. You looked like such a happy pair in your pictures!”

Oberyn smiled at that, “Thank you so much, Mrs. Lannister! Cersei made having fun in the danger zone ridiculously easy.”

At this point Jaime was red in the face with frustration and Tyrion noticed this could quickly turn into a shit show if someone didn’t do something, so he proceeded to pretend to choke. Everyone stopped what they were doing and turned to him concerned, Jaime quickly patted him on the back and he stopped coughing, “My apologies, it must’ve gone down the wrong pipe. Thank you, brother, for your help,” he said with a muffled laugh.

The adults looked on before agreeing dinner was over and heading up to Bartholomew’s office to discuss their next donation deal and charity event, leaving the teenagers downstairs to entertain themselves.   
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

They sat in the game room watching Bronn and Tyrion play Call of Duty for what seemed like hours when Oberyn moved to sit next to Jaime. 

“Lannister, you seem pissed.”

Jaime gave a small snort, “Is it that obvious? You’re flaunting your relationship with my…girlfriend?...my ex? I don’t know what she is right now, but whatever you have with her, I don’t like it.”

Oberyn gave him a long laugh but looked rather defeated when be stated, “We aren’t dating. We’re just friends, she made sure I knew that from the get go. Apparently, she has some guy she’s in love with that wanted to go on a break for the summer; he sounds like an idiot to me. I’m simply a strong companion. Don’t get me wrong, I still have a massive crush on her.” He gazed off in the distance and smiled, “Hell, I might even be in love with her after this summer. I have tried for two months to romantically catch her eye, but she’s YOUR girl, whether she wants to admit it or not. I knew I didn’t stand a chance when she walked out to breakfast one morning in her pajamas, a pair of satin shorts and shirt that was far too large to have been hers with the name ‘Lannister’ written on the back. Believe it or not, she puts on a good ‘fuck you’ front, but she’s struggled without you. Go talk to her.”

Jaime stood to go find her; “I still hate you and will definitely kick your ass if you ever attempt to make a move on her again, but thanks for being her friend this summer. I’m sure she needed it.”

He found her in her room on the balcony staring at the stars. He looked at her for a few minutes, taking all of it in before he moved silently and wrapped his arms around her. She jumped, startled before turning in his arms, “What do you think your doing?”

He looked at her with half hooded eyes and moved his hand to her cheek before breaking down, “I’m here to apologize. For everything. I’m sorry for losing my temper so quickly the past few months and for being a jealous idiot. I’m sorry I suggested we go on a break and left you without an explanation. I’m sorry I sometimes treat you like property and am so selfish with your time and attention. I’m sorry I don’t tell you I love you as often as I should. I’m sorry I jumped you earlier about Oberyn. But most of all, I’m sorry I gave up on us so quickly when you never did. You are the greatest thing to happen to me and I do not appreciate that enough. I love you and I am sorry I’m so hateful. 

By the end of his speech he had tears rolling down his eyes, she began wiping the tears away, “Thank you. I love you and I hope never giving up on us isn’t going to be my downfall but I’m no better than you. I do things simply to get a reaction from you. I actively try to piss you off. I’m sorry for that. I’m sorry for being a hateful and toxic girlfriend. Oberyn, Ned Stark, they were just pawns in a game of chess. I’m sorry for playing games, for being so harsh on you, for the leash I keep you on because I don’t want anyone else to have your attention. You’re hateful and so am I.” 

She took his hands and slowly led him to her bed where they laid, holding each other in silence until she spoke, “I don’t want to break up.”

He kissed her, “Then we won’t. Here. I have something for you.” He said as he reached into his pant pocket and pulled out a ring box, “it’s not an engagement ring, I promise, simply a promise ring. A promise to be better, to love you every single day, and to eventually marry you. I love you.”

“Jaime, I love it. I love you. I love us.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys liked it! Comment what you would like to see next!


	4. All of Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Post Medical School, Pre Paging Dr. Lannister(s) (which I promise to update soon, sorry). Cersei and Jaime are 25-26 in this one!

She was sitting on her grandmother’s penthouse balcony overlooking the New York skyline pondering her successes. She and her brother were a month away from graduating medical school, she would be graduating with honors, and she had a residency lined out with New York Hospital. She also had an incredible boyfriend who happened to take the same residency. Her life was going perfectly until Bronn dropped this morning’s page 6 in front of her and she saw a picture of said boyfriend in Victrola, a popular burlesque club, with a red head practically in his lap. Surprisingly, anger was not her initial response; instead she was slightly bothered and highly confused. 

She met Bronn with a raised brow, “what the hell did he do?”

“It’s my fault. I mean, Addam and I were hanging out last night and we got bored so I suggested we go out. We got a little hammered and called Lannister to come pick us up. He nearly made us walk because he was worried about what people, mainly you, would think if he was spotted around there. He didn’t do anything, if that’s your concern. She approached us and I was trying to get her attention but she only had eyes for golden boy. The entire time he only spoke about you and she eventually got put off and left. This pic was just snapped at the perfect time for the paparazzi and the worst time for poor Jaime. I figured I would show it to you and tell you it was basically my doing before you put him in timeout.”

“Yes, poor Jaime. It must be horrible to command the attention of every woman in the room.”

“Nothing happened! He came to get us and she jumped his bones, so try not to sound so jealous, sis. While green definitely is your color, jealousy causes wrinkles. Gross, right?” Bronn said with a wink before strutting off. 

With a sigh she reached for her phone to call Jaime but was distracted when she received a message from Tyrion, asking her to meet him at the Hearth for brunch. She grabbed her jacket, hopped in the town car, and headed for East Village. 

She tried calling Jaime during the ride but was met with his voicemail twice. She knew she shouldn’t be mad, he didn’t even intend to be there, he hadn’t even wanted to go out, but she couldn’t shake how much it had bothered her to see another woman gripping his arm, sitting too close for proper conversation. It’s not like she had any reason to worry about him stepping out, but maybe if he wasn’t taking his precious time to propose there would’ve been a ring on his hand to indicate he was spoken for. She let that thought die before it blossomed. They had discussed it, while they were as in love as ever, he didn’t want to get married until he was an established surgeon, which would be another 5-6 years. Of course, that talk had been before Euron Greyjoy had tried to move in on her, and she had nearly allowed it, while she and Jaime were on a break last fall. He was borderline obsessive regarding everything she did for weeks once they got back together, the thought of someone else actually having her shook him to the core. 

The town car coming to a stop pulled her out of her thoughts and as she climbed out she was met with the emerald green eyes of Jaime Lannister looking at her from the upstairs balcony. With her eyebrow cocked and her lips pursed, she met him with a cool look that he immediately interpreted as a one-way ticket to the doghouse. He knew he should have just sent a car to get Bronn and Addam but they had insisted it had to be him or else they wouldn’t leave and he didn’t think for one second a woman would confidently approach him, as everyone knew he and Cersei were forever, and he definitely didn’t think page 6 would get such an incriminating picture. 

Jaime reached for her when she finally made her way to the table, “Hey, Bronn told me you saw the picture and were rather bothered by it. I need you to know, I didn’t do anything. I only love you. I didn’t even want to go get them; it was a bad judgment call. And I’m sorry, so sorry,” he said as he grabbed her hands. 

“I believe you. Bronn told me it was all basically his fault, he was the one trying to get her attention she just happened to awe struck by you. On another note, she does have a fine taste in men,” she responded with a small smile. “So is Tyrion actually here or did you just use him as pawn to get me to come see you?”

Jaime sheepishly ran a hand through his hair and admitted to using Tyrion to get her to show up in case she was too pissed at him to talk. “I have actually been thinking for awhile that our lives would be easier if we had something to indicate that we are both taken and happily in love. I’ve really sat on it and decided the best way would be for it to be known is like this,” Jaime lowered to one knee in the middle of their favorite brunch site, the location of their first “official” date, where they had their first real kiss, “Cersei, you keep my head spinning. Your smart mouth keeps me on my toes. My thoughts are constantly clouded in your presence because I’m thinking about you and what you’re thinking about. You are like this magical mystery ride I’m stuck on and I’m dizzy but I don’t want to ever get off. It’s like my head is underwater but I’m breathing fine. Since we were 10 you have completely consumed my existence, all of me loves every piece of you, all the perfect imperfections. I want to wake up every morning next to you; I want to have long nights trading daily hospital stories, I only ever want to kiss you. I want you to be the mother of my children, my lover forever. I choose you every day for the rest of my life and I want you to choose me every single day. Will you marry me?”

Cersei stared at him, shocked. She didn’t think he wanted this so soon, granted they hadn’t spoken on the topic in a hot minute. 

Jaime pitched her a nervous laugh, “Babe, my knee is killing me and your hesitation is scaring me and everyone is watching now.”

This shook Cersei out of her thoughts and she realized that he actually did it, he proposed, “YES! Oh my goodness, a thousand times, YES. Jaime, I will be your wife,” she said excitedly and pulled him in for a long hug as the people around them began to cheer. 

Later that evening, after they had told all of high society they were engaged, Cersei snuck off to the balcony in Jaime’s room at Casterly Rock. She watched the sunset engulf the New York countryside as Jaime crept up and encircled her in a hug. She thought of their combined successes and their recent engagement and sighed contently before turning on Jaime and giving him the kiss he’d been waiting for all day.


	5. Nice to Meet Ya

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A fun little shot where Myrcella's boyfriend meets her parents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jaime and Cersei mid 40s, Myrcella and Tommen 15-16, Trystane 16.

“I’m sorry. It’s what?”

“It’s karaoke night and Trystane really wants to go and he’s been dying to meet you guys. We can all have dinner and become acquainted and maybe do some karaoke.”

Jaime and Cersei shared a look and did a bit of non verbal communication, “alright, we’ll go under one condition...”

“Okay, and that is???”

“…Your father has to sing something.”

Jaime threw her a surprised look, “My apologies, something must have gotten lost in translation because that is NOT what I nonverbally communicated, Cersei.”

“Well, that’s how I interpreted it, Jaime. You two sort it out, I need to make sure Tommen is packed for his weekend with Tyrion and Shae.”

Myrcella looked at Jaime with the best puppy dog eyes she could muster up, “Dad, pleaseeeee. It would make my whole world and you’ll finally get to meet my boyf-...guy friend...AND it’ll make mom so happy if you sing, like really really happy,” she added with a wink. 

Jaime stood, sighed, and gave her a smirk and a raised brow, “if you’re implying this would get me laid, I have other methods of achieving that. Come up with a better pitch.”

Myrcella threw her hands up and stomped out of the living room, “Ugh. MOM! Your HUSBAND isn’t cooperating…and he’s being gross.”

Cersei and Tommen eventually made their way down the stairs only to find an empty living room and foyer. 

“Well, good luck with that, Mom. Dad seems kind of distressed ever since Cella decided to date Tristan or whatever his name is. Uncle Tyrion and Uncle Bronn said it’s because he’s a Martell, whatever that means.”

Cersei stopped in her tracks, “I’m sorry, he’s a what?”

Tommen walked on, unbothered, not noticing his mother’s change in demeanor, and began to ramble, “Martell. It’s his last name. Similar to me being a Lannister but I don’t think his name gives off as much allure or power as mine.”

They finally reached Tommen’s car when Cersei realized why Jaime was in a mood, “Oh my gosh, shut up, Tommen. I need to go find your father. Have a good weekend!”

“Okay? Bye? Love you too? See you...okay you’re gone,” Tommen said to the air before jumping in the vehicle to head to Tyrion’s.

While Cersei was hunting for Jaime, Myrcella managed to find her before she found him, “Mom, he’ll be here soon PLEASE convince dad to act decent. Or at least talk to him maybe try to lighten him up. He’s been so weird since I told you guys Trystane is my boyfriend.”

Cersei pulled Myrcella in for a hug, “I’ll handle your father, although it would have been nice if you would have mentioned Trystane’s last name. You know the Lannisters aren’t overtly fond of the Martells; some history that dates back to when your grandfather was in his prime.”

“Yeah, I guess I could have mentioned that but there is no way he would’ve let me date him then. He nearly said no anyway.”

Just then Jaime came bouncing around the corner with a false smile, “Is he almost here? I’m starving and would like to get my karaoke debut over with.”

“Wow, Dad, I appreciate the change in mood,” They were interrupted by a housekeeper announcing Trystane’s arrival, “okay I’ll go greet him and then we’ll meet you in the car. Mom…” Myrcella finished with her eyes darting towards Jaime, implying that Cersei should talk to him. 

Cersei grabbed his hand and lead him in the direction of the garage, “Jaime,” she used the tone she often used with the kids before she began a scolding or lecture.

He gave her a cute, innocent smile, “Cersei.” 

“What’s up?”

He helped her into the car before making his way to the driver’s seat, “Truth?”

She kissed his cheek, “Truth.”

He sighed and closed his eyes; “First, I think she’s too young for a boyfriend. Second, he’s a Martell. I’m not sure whom my father will kill first upon finding this out; her, him, or me. Now, you’re probably going to ask why I changed my mood; well, I invited your brother to dinner,” he finished his statement with a shit eating grin. 

“ARE YOU SERIOUS? You are…an asshole. First, she’s fifteen, she has straight As, she’s captain of the track team, co-captain of the cheer squad, she participates in multiple clubs, and she’s a member of the National Honors Society. We raised a damn good kid, who deserves more credit than what you’re giving her. When we were fifteen we had been officially dating for like A YEAR AND HALF.”

“Yeah, and I know what we did when we were her age. I don’t want her doing that!” He retorted frantically. 

“So she can’t date because of all the things you and I did? She can’t do those things but it was just fine that you did them to me.”

Jaime looked at her pleadingly, “WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. That is not what I was getting at. You wanted it, don’t say I DID them to you. You definitely DID your fair share to me, babe. Here they come, just drop it.”

Cersei crossed her arms and glared straight ahead, “I’ll drop it, if you text Bronn and tell him not to come. You get to slay this dragon by yourself, hot shot.”

The ride to the restaurant went by quickly and quietly, Cersei honestly could not believe they were actually here, of all places, it was a bit Tribeca to their Upper East Side but Myrcella had insisted. Of course, she had also insisted Jaime and Cersei don’t act overly posh and pretentious while on this meet the parents date but we’ll see how long that lasts. They entered the building and a waiter sat them at a table near a small stage. 

They took their seats and Jaime leaned into Cersei and whispered, “How did we end up here?” He seemed a bit culture shocked.

Cersei gave him a pat on the cheek and a small smile, “Be nice,” she turned to Myrcella and Trystane who were also in quiet conversation, “Trystane, do you come here often?”

He gave Myrcella a wide-eyed look and nervously replied, “Yes. Actually, my family owns it. Myrcella has also been here a few times with our friend group.”

Jaime nodded, “Interesting,” he said with a bored undertone. 

Myrcella looked pleadingly at her mother hoping she would make Jaime at least pretend to have fun.

“It actually is, Dad. Here in a bit the waiter will come back with a sheet and we’ll all have to write down our karaoke song and then they’ll put everybody’s entry in that bucket over there and draw them throughout the night. So you never really know when you’ll have to go up and sing or if you’ll even have to go up; they cut off drawings at 10:30 and then its open mic. It’s a lot of fun! I’m sure you’ll love it!”

Jaime looked around at all three of them with a glint of realization in his eyes, he then stared accusingly at Cersei, “You knew this, didn’t you?”

Cersei did her best to look completely innocent, “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” before taking a long sip of her drink.

Jaime laughed and pulled her in for a tight hug, “You knew I was probably going to have to sing regardless,” he clicked his tongue and released her, “well, it is a good thing I didn’t uninvite Bronn. Can’t have him missing our chance to duet.”

“DAD! You invited Uncle Bronn? What the heck? Let’s just call up Tommen and Uncle Tyrion. Maybe they can bring grandma and grandpa. You cannot be serious.”

Jaime admired how much she looked and sounded like her mother in that moment before he was met with a slap on the bicep, “Jaime, what the hell? I clearly stated no Bronn.” 

Jaime met that with a toothy grin before Trystane spoke up, “It’s okay, Mr. and Mrs. Lannister, Myrcella, my uncle is here anyway so I might as well get to meet one of yours.”

Jaime sighed and rolled his eyes, “Please tell me you have more than one uncle…”

A hand clasped Jaime’s shoulder as soon as that came out, “Afraid not, Lannister. He only has one. Allow me to reintroduce myself,” he stuck his hand out, “Oberyn Martell, karaoke host every other week, and co-owner of this beautiful establishment. Jaime, its good to see you again,” he said as he shook Jaime’s hand, “And Cersei, you look as beautiful as ever,” he added as he kissed the back of her hand. 

Jaime had a fixed, overly friendly smile on his face, “It’s great to see you too, Oberyn. You can call her Mrs. Lannister if you would like,” he smartly added as he kissed her other hand.

“Jaime,” Cersei said threateningly.

Oberyn shook his head, “No, he’s right, Mrs. Lannister. How could I forget the wedding of the century?” he added rhetorically. “I am pleased to see my nephew has found a beautiful, intelligent companion in your daughter. She had to have inherited that from you, Cersei.”

Cersei grabbed an annoyed Jaime’s hand, “We’re just happy to see her happy. Oberyn it was nice seeing you again and this is a nice place you have.”

Oberyn smiled and fondly looked at Cersei, “The same for you. Owning this beauty definitely has its perks, like tonight, I get to see a society’s best, Jaime and Cersei Lannister, sing karaoke,” he added with a kind chuckle. “If you need anything, just call for me. I’ll get you set up,” he smiled kindly before turning to Trystane, “Have fun tonight, but don’t be stupid. If you need anything call,” and he was off to entertain other guests.

Cersei lightly rubbed the nape of Jaime’s neck attempting to coax him out of his silent discontent. She leaned over and pecked his lips, “I love you.” He gave her a small smile, “I love you too.”

Their moment was interrupted when the waiter dropped off their song cards, Jaime perked up real quick, “Alright, Trystane, how does this work?” he asked with a smile.

Trystane looked at Jaime, somewhat taken back he had spoken to him at all before quickly recovering, “Alright, Mr. Lannister, well, first you’ll pick solo or duet, then you’ll write down the song, artist, and genre- my go to is Broken by lovelytheband. The waiter will be back to get the cards in a few minutes.”

“Sound good! I actually really like that song,” Jaime began writing before pausing and looking up, “Also, just call me Jaime. Mr. Lannister is my father and I am not him.”

Myrcella and Cersei smiled at each other as Trystane looked up like he had just received some incredible honor, “Okay…cool! So what songs are you guys choosing?”

Cersei spoke first, “I was thinking ‘You’re So Vain’ by Carly Simon, dedicated to my husband, of course.”

“Said husband does not think that’s a bright idea because he once heard pay back is a bitch,” he replied with a winning smirk.

“Mom, Dad, you guys should duet!”

“He’s not doing a duet with me; he’s doing a duet with his work wife, Bronn.”

“Bronn, your sweet brother Bronn. He actually decided not to intrude tonight. Said business came up, but I think he got a booty call. Honestly, a much better offer if you ask me,” Jaime said while staring hard at Cersei, “That means we can duet. I also think a duet with you would be more beneficial to me, if you’re reading what I’m writing,” he added while raising his brows up and down.

“Dad, really? Is that all you think about?”

“It’s all he’s ever thought about,” Cersei added while filling out her song sheet.

“Is it just pick on Jaime night? That’s it, I’m singing a solo now and this one is dedicated to you, sweetheart,” he said sweetly to Cersei.

The waiter came back to collect their cards and placed their food orders before them. Dinner went relatively well and Jaime and Trystane were able to bond over their love for sports. Several people had already been called to sing, most were not great, but it was still entertaining to watch. Myrcella’s friend Bran took the stage and sang Rihanna’s ‘Bitch Better Have My Money’ and absolutely killed it. 

Oberyn took the stage next, “Alright, as the night begins to wind down we have reached our final singer. A drum roll please,” he dramatically stuck his hand in the lavish bucket and pulled out a card, “Trystane Martell and Jaime Lannister singing Jealous by Nick Jonas.”

Trystane stood, giggling with Myrcella as Cersei laughed at Jaime’s jaw hitting the floor, “Let’s go, Jaime! The crowd is about to chant our names!”

Jaime looked at him with squinted eyes, “I didn’t choose this song!?”

“I did though, and I chose to duet it with you. It’s like a bonding activity.”

“We were BONDING perfectly fine. You just had to go and ruin it,” Jaime stood slowly and walked towards the stage, whispering, “You cannot be serious. This can’t be happening. Be cool. You are cool.”

Once they were both settled on stage with microphones in hand the music began. Jaime started I don’t like the way he’s looking at you with a hip thrust and finger pointing at Cersei. I’m starting to think you want him too. Am I crazy? Have I lost ya? Even though I know you love me, can’t help it. He hit his best Michael Jackson spin and sang to the chorus. Trystane took the second verse as Jaime swayed his hips occasionally thrusting them in an embarrassed Cersei’s direction. They sang the final chorus together, Trystane taking the high notes and Jaime ending the song by throwing his jacket at Cersei. The two were met with cheers from the crowd as they made their way back to their seats. 

“First off, Dad, I didn’t know you could sing. Second, please NEVER move your hips like that in public again, you now have fangirls,” Myrcella said point off to a group of middle aged women who were definitely pointing and staring at Jaime.

“Yeah, Mr. Lann-…Jaime, you absolutely killed it. I think we make quite the duo!” Trystane added with a mega watt smile.

“Definitely, I think you just took Bronn’s place in the band, Trystane. I also think we should get out of here though, before your mom gets jealous and all,” he directed at Myrcella as Cersei coolly stared at the women. 

Cersei snapped her head in his direction, “I am NOT jealous,” she was met with a harmony of laughs as they stood to leave.

The ride home was more relaxed than the ride there. Jaime and Trystane were getting along really well and Cersei obviously enjoyed him. They pulled into the Lannister’s driveway laughing at some cheesy joke Trystane had told. Jaime and Cersei made their way inside as Myrcella walked Trystane to his car. 

Before he made it into the house, Jaime turned and yelled, “TRYSTANE, it was nice to meet ya!”

Trystane pitched him a massive toothy smile, “You too, Jaime! Maybe we can hang out sometime?!”

Myrcella grabbed his hand, shaking her head and laughing because she definitely just lost her boyfriend to her father, “You did it! You’re the first guy to make it through dinner with my parents and you managed to get both of them to like you!”

“I can be quite the charmer when I need to be. I was really worried about your father though.”

“You survived Jaime Lannister! You’ve leveled up, next you get to meet Grandpa Tywin,” She said before kissing him and leaving him to new anxieties regarding the Lannister family. 

Meanwhile, Cersei and Jaime had made their way upstairs to their bedroom. They stood in front of a full-length mirror, Jaime holding her from behind, admiring each other.

Jaime pecked her temple before breaking the peaceful silence, “I like him. A lot. I’m also glad he managed to break the 7 year crush she had on Robb Stark.”

Cersei turned in his arms and wrapped her arms around his torso, “I’m glad you like him because she does. A lot. And believe it or not, your opinion matters to her,” she said as she moved back to look him in the eyes, “Now you get to introduce him to YOUR father,” she said as she kissed his nose, untied herself from his limbs, and walked into their closet, leaving him to his newfound anxieties regarding Tywin meeting Trystane.


	6. Video Games

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another high school aged AU.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They're all 17-18 here.

Cersei leaned back against her headboard and began putting the finishing touches on an essay while Jaime sat off to her left with a headset on and a video game controller in hand. He, Bronn, Addam, and Tyrion had been at it for hours, frantically talking strategy into the connected mic. It was nearing 2 am and she knew Jaime shouldn’t be over, let alone in her room. Firstly, her parents were gone, no one was supposed to be in the house except for her and Bronn; all trust had gone out the window after last year’s incident with the Lannister house party. Secondly, he was still in season and had a curfew that had been thrown out the window 3 hours ago; Tywin was going to be pissed. Finally, they both know what is going to happen as soon as he gets done with his precious video game, which would result in him just staying the night, and more sneaking around. 

She closed her laptop and made her way over to the seat he was on. He acknowledged her with a soft smile and a kiss on the cheek and she laid her head on his shoulder while he stared at her. The momentary distraction was enough for his gaming character to die and Bronn to cuss him through the headset.

“Look, Lannister, why don’t you and Tyrion set up together and duo with us. It’ll be easier and you can hook it up to the surround sound in one of your rooms,” Bronn suggested. 

Tyrion knowingly laughed and decided to play along, “Yeah, Jaime! Why don’t you come down the hallway and we can get our usual set up going?”

Jaime looked at Cersei frantically searching for a solution. She silently laughed before grabbing his hand and attempting to pull him up towards the bed.

Jaime quickly realized what she was playing at, “Hey guys, I’m going to take a little break, like 15-20 minutes, then we can reconnect, deal?”

He was met with groans and Bronn yelling so loudly they could actually hear him two doors down, “WHATEVER. YOUR ASS BETTER BE BACK AND YOU BETTER BE ON DUOS WITH TY. WE HAVE TO WIN THE NEXT ROUND.”

Cersei had gotten him in bed and was now straddling his waist when he said, “Your brother. He is a handful sometimes.”

She leaned down and brushed her lips over his, “All of the time, but I don’t want to talk about my brother right now.”

She completely devoured his mouth before his mind caught up with his body and he flipped them over. She managed to get his shirt off and before he could react she also had hers off. He began to nip at the newly exposed skin as her hands expertly worked off his sweatpants. While she was on the brink of freeing his erection, he had successfully wiggled his hand down her satin bottoms and had plunged two fingers inside. She gasped loudly but was quickly silenced when Jaime covered her mouth with his. She finally regained enough control to begin stroking him while he was pumping his digits in and out of her. He pulled his fingers out before she could cum and licked them clean and then lovingly kissed her as she continued to run her hand up and down his shaft. He began breathing heavily, on the edge of spilling in her hands, and he quickly patted her hands away and slowly pulled her bottoms and underwear down her legs, preparing to fully enter her when they heard a knock at the door. 

They both continued to touch each other, refusing to acknowledge someone was at her door when they heard Bronn, “Cersei, open up! I need you to call Jaime. His dumbass won’t answer any of my calls. This is important.”

Cersei sighed and threw her head back as Jaime collapsed on top of her and nested his head in the crook of her neck, “You have got to be kidding me. Not only is he a handful, he’s also a cockblock.”

“Don’t get pissy now. All you had to do was come over to my house. I guarantee Tyrion would never do this, whether he knew you were there or not.”

“Whatever.” Cersei rolled her eyes and kissed Jaime one more time before pushing him off of her to get redressed, “You should probably put your pants back on. He’s liable to come in any moment.”

Just as Jaime got his pants adjusted, the room door burst open to reveal a confused and surprised Bronn. 

“Seriously, dude? You have been here the entire time? Like right down the hallway from me?”

Jaime shrugged, “I mean, yeah. I’ve been here all night. It’s not my fault you’re not observant at all.”

Bronn looked between Cersei and Jaime a few times and noticed how flushed and frustrated they looked, “Oh yeah? How was that 15-20 minute break going?”

Cersei stood up and walked to her connected bathroom, “It was going rather well until you decided to interrupt.”

Jaime nodded in agreement, “Why did you need to get ahold of me so desperately anyway?”

Bronn stared at Jaime incredulously, “Because break time is over. We have zombies to kill and world to save. It’s a good thing I busted in here too; you can’t bang my sister in my house. That like breaks bro code, dude.”

Cersei peered around the corner with a smirk, “Consider bro code broken, Bronn. He does it at least once a week.”

Bronn glared at her, “Seriously, Cersei? Quit sleeping with my friend. We’re losing bro time. You’re a horrible influence,” Bronn flopped down on the seat next to Jaime and grabbed a controller, “I’m pissed. Lannister, grab a controller were finishing this game right here.”

Jaime raised a brow, “In Cersei’s room? We’re finishing the game?”

“Yeah, she wants to screw my friends, I’m going to screw over her sleep routine.”

Cersei made her way out of her bathroom and saw the two of them yelling to their headsets and moved to turn off the light before crawling into bed, “You’ve got to be kidding me,” she said aloud more so to herself than to anyone. 

Bronn smiled victoriously, “Nope, sis. Dead serious.”

“Good night, Cers. I love you,” Jaime added as he kissed the air in her direction.

“I hate you both,” and she rolled over in an attempt to find sleep.


	7. The Ringer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short and sweet shot that somewhat stems off Paging Dr. Lannister(s), which I haven't abandoned, I promise!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cersei and Jaime are in their early to mid 30s, Tommen is like 3. Inspired by an episode of Grey's Anatomy.

Cersei walked down the hallway away from her office when Jaime snuck up on her, “Hey!” he said as he poked her sides.

She turned with a surprised look, “Hi! What are you doing here?”

He grabbed her hand and led her down the hallway, “I know its my day off, but I missed you AND I would like to take you to lunch AND I wanted to see you AND I would like to do this,” he stated as he pulled her into a conference room and started to kiss her.

She kind of let out a half laugh and he pulled back, confused, only to realize it was the beginning of a sob. She gave him a very nervous look with tears in her eyes, “I’m sorry. I lost my wedding ring,” she shakily proclaimed as she lifted her left hand to prove it. “I lost the ring your great grandfather brought back after he helped lead the invasion of Normandy. I know this ring has a lot of sentimental value to your family so I debated even telling you but I knew you were obviously going to notice.”

Jaime ran his hands up and down her arms in an attempt to calm her, “hey, hey, stop crying. It’s okay.”

She frantically argued back, “No, no, it’s not okay. This ring is everything to you. AND I LOST IT.”

He shrugged and gave a small smile, “It definitely means more to my mom. She’s going to kill me…or you,” Cersei was in full hysterics at this point, “but its okay, but she’s not going to know. We’re not going to say anything because WE are going to find it, okay? We’ll do it together, okay?”

Cersei simply nodded before placing her forehead on his chest and sighing in momentarily defeat before he lifted her chin, “You put it on this morning, so it has to be somewhere in this hospital. Let’s retrace your steps.”

Cersei and Jaime were on a warpath throughout the hospital when she confidentially pulled him into a break room, “It has to be here. I made coffee when I got arrived and then I washed my hands. It easily could’ve slid off and went down the drain.”

Jaime nodded, “Alright,” he proceeded to get underneath the sink to perform a small surgery on the pipes to find the ring. 

He was in the process of unscrewing the pipes, “So you’re sure it’s here?”

She was pacing around above him, “I think,” she said as he began to stand up. He looked at her expectantly, “What do you mean ‘you think’? Cers, are we even in the right lounge?”

“Yes, we are because I sat here and discussed weddings with Tyrion.”

Neither of them saw Brienne, Tyrion’s intern, up until that moment. Jaime gave her a friendly wave, “Oh hey!”

She looked confused and slightly taken back, “Hi. You’re operating…on a sink?

He nodded with a tight-lipped smile, “Yeah, we’re looking for a ring,” he replied before turning back to the sink.

Cersei excitedly turned to her, “You haven’t seen one, have you?”

“Umm, no,” she replied before exiting to find Tyrion. 

Cersei bent over Jaime and looked underneath the sink, “Maybe we should call maintenance.”

Jaime grunted and began to get off the floor, “Yeah…I don’t think it’s down here,” he added as his phone buzzed with an alert. “Cers, it’s daycare, Tommen just threw up. We should get down there.”

Cersei held Tommen close once they got to his daycare on the third floor, “What did he have for breakfast?” She questioned Jaime.

He moved closer to rub Tommen’s back, “An egg. He probably caught something that one of Tyrion’s patients had. I swear he is a test patient for half of this hospital. I should’ve just kept him at home. Bringing him in wasn’t necessary.”

Jaime felt bad so Cersei gave him a sympathetic look, “Well, you said so yourself he didn’t seem like himself this morning.”

“Yeah, well, I say a lot of things,” he replied before looking away.

Cersei continued to rock Tommen, “See, you are mad at me about the ring.”

“I’m not mad about the ring,” He replied with an incredulous look on his face.

“YOU ARE. I can feel you seething.”

“What? I’m what?”

A nurse interrupted them, “Sorry to bother but images of his stomach should be coming up as we speak,” as she pointed to a monitor.

Jaime and Cersei moved to examine the monitor and were met with a pleasant surprise, “Is that?” “Oh yeah!”

Jaime turned to Tommen, “Did you swallow mommy’s ring?” Tommen only gave a childish giggle. He then turned to Cersei, “I know you feel bad but it could have been worse. You could have lost it inside a patient.”

She rolled her eyes, “Yeah, it’s just lost inside of OUR CHILD instead.”

Jaime ran his hand over her cheek before leaning in to kiss her, “Calm down. At least we know where it is. You go finish rounds and then meet us in your office. I’m taking him to Tyrion to see if we can get it out.”

Jaime and Tommen left the room, stopping in the doorframe only to wave at Cersei. She could hear him down the hall, speaking in a baby voice, coddling Tommen, “Let’s go see TyTy so he can fix this mess, yeah?”


	8. Home Run

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their adventures in parenting. Cersei and Jaime are mid to late 30s. Tommen is 7 and Myrcella is 6-ish.

Jaime stood on the pitcher’s mound, he had not been in this position in roughly 20 years. This time was different though, instead of working to strike out an opponent, he was focusing on not striking out his son. He had accidentally done it four times this season and Cersei had nearly killed him every time. Coach pitch baseball wasn’t easy, especially when you were the coach that pitched. 

“Alright, Tommen, just like we practiced at home, buddy,” Jaime encouraged before he tossed the pitch. 

Tommen swung the bat and missed which resulted in him spinning around and falling. He had been in a hitting slump for the past week and between him and Jaime the level of frustration was high. Tommen frustrated because he wasn’t hitting the ball and Jaime frustrated because, like his mother, Tommen tended to get a heated attitude when things weren’t going his way. He looked to Cersei in the crowd with tears in his eyes. 

“Look at me, Tommen, look at me. You’re good, bud. You’ve got two more,” Jaime said jogging to him while eyeing Cersei, who luckily was paying attention to Myrcella at the moment. “Just keep your eye on the ball, alright? Just like at home in the yard. I know you can do it,” he added with a thumbs up before Tommen huffed and said, “let’s do this, dad,” with a fist bump. 

Cersei sat Myrcella in her lap and turned her attention back to the game. She prayed Jaime chose not to tell Tommen his at bat determined if they go to the Little League World Series, she really couldn’t handle the emotions of that today. Jaime made his way back to the pitching mound, she also hoped he remembered that if he struck her son out sex was off the table for a week...well maybe 2 days. 

Jaime tossed the ball in the direction of home plate and he heard a crack of the bat as the ball wizzed by. He looked at Tommen, who was still standing in the batter’s box. All they heard was Cersei yell, “Tommen, RUN” as he took off towards first base. The hit ended up being an in the park home run that knocked in three runs to help gain the victory the Kings needed to get to the World Series. 

After shaking the opposing team’s hands and getting their regional championship medals, Tommen sprinted off the field, “MOM! Mom. MOM, I did it. I broke my hitting slump!” The seven year old yelled excitedly as he jumped into Cersei’s arms. 

“I saw! And you hit a home run! I am so proud of you!” She said as she hugged him tightly. 

Jaime approached the duo slowly with Myrcella clinging to his neck, “Mom! Mom. mom! I did it. I didn’t strike him out!” Jaime said jumping up and down while Myrcella giggled. Cersei kissed his cheek, “I saw! I’m so proud of you too, Coach Lannister!”

Myrcella shifted in Jaime’s arms, “Mommy, can I stay the night with grandpa Bart?”

“Did you ask them if you could stay?”

“Uh duh! They said I could,” she replied in an innocent enough tone. 

“That sounds fine, darling. Tommen are you going to stay the night as well?”

Tommen shook his head yes excitedly as he and Myrcella hopped down and ran off to Cersei’s parents. 

After making sure the kids were secure with Bart and Celeste, Jaime and Cersei headed home. 

“I have got to take a shower. I smell like outside, sunscreen, and I’m pretty sure there is dirt in places there shouldn’t be dirt,” Cersei said as they made their way into the house. 

Jaime grabbed her by the waist before she could enter the master bathroom, “dirt? Places it shouldn’t be? I feel like I should help you with that,” he murmured as he kissed and sucked her neck. 

She leaned back into him, “Jaime, shower, now,” she said in a raspy voice before pulling him into the shower. 

He quickly stripped himself before helping her out of her attire. Once she was undressed he stepped back to look at her, “I don’t see dirt anywhere. You’re a liar,” he said before she pulled him into the marble shower. 

“You do realize I’m in here to actually clean myself, right?” she asked as he pushed her back against the wall. 

“Shower second. Shower sex first,” he stated as he toyed with her nipple; she reacted by death gripping his cock, “gods, pleaseeeee. Shower sex first.”

She slowly began stroking him, “Coach Lannister, you did so good today. I’m very pleased with the victory,” she whispered in his ear. 

This elicited a moan from him as his hands ran up and down her sides before finally resting on her ass. His rested his forehead on hers and his hooded eyes met her bright ones before he lifted her and thrusted himself deep inside of her, “Oh god, Jaime,” echoed off the bathroom walls as he pounded into her. 

He placed his head in the crook of her neck, still hammering into her before she threw her weight forward, nearly knocking them off balance, and attacked his mouth with hers. He knew this was coming, she couldn’t handle not being in control for long. He reacted by slamming them against the shower wall, bound to leave a bruise, he went back to sporadically thrusting deep into her. Her breathing was uneven, she was panting hard into his ear, “Jaime. Jaime. Jaime.” They both climaxed together, taking the other’s name in vain as they did. 

His weight collapsed on her, still posted up on the shower wall, “I love you,” he said looking dreamily into her eyes. 

She calmly pecked his nose, “As adorable as Tommen’s home run was I think I got more pleasure out of the one you just hit.” She added before starting round two.


	9. Guiding Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another high school time period snippet!

Cersei sighed and leaned back in her seat. She had spent the last 4 hours overseeing a blood drive the school was hosting, it was one of her many tedious duties as student council president. She was pretty zoned until two girls walked by discussing the winter ball. Her eyes shot opened, ah yes, the ball. The thing Jaime still hasn’t asked her to. Two years ago he would’ve jumped at the opportunity to do something flamboyant to alert the public they were going together, but he had been slacking lately. It’s almost as if things were getting too easy for him, he was putting in less effort on every front; they didn’t go out on dates anymore, they just hung out at their houses; the sex wasn’t lacking but it wasn’t as exciting as it had been. They were going through the motions and him just assuming she’d be his date was a prime example. 

She was pulled from her thoughts by Tyrion, who plopped himself down next to her, “Cers, I need help.”

She slowly turned her head and raised a brow, “With what?”

“I need to come up with a creative way to ask Alys Reyne to the ball.”

“Alys Reyne? I thought you guys broke up?” she asked with a huff.

“We did but then we got back together, I just haven’t told anyone yet.”

Cersei smiled, “Your parents will be pissed but I’ll definitely help you.”

“Okay. Okay. Perfect! I was thinking a synchronized dance number in the cafeteria!” He exclaimed excitedly. 

“And I’m thinking a hard no. What the hell, Tyrion? A dance number? This isn’t Grease.”

Just as he was about to pitch a few more bogus ideas, Jaime interrupted. He hugged Cersei from behind and kissed her cheek before sitting down, “How are my two favorite people?”

“I’m alright.”

“Honestly, I’ve been better,” Tyrion said as he stood to leave, “Cersei, I’ll come over tonight and we can work out the details,” he yelled behind him with a wave. 

“Why does he get to hang out with you tonight and I don’t?”

“His is important. Yours is to get out of finishing a chemistry lab report. It’s different,” she said with a fake scolding tone. 

They were both silent for a minute while Jaime admired her. Her hair was back in a lazy bun with pieces framing her face like a halo. He laughed at how utterly inaccurate that was. 

“What are you laughing at,” she questioned irritably. 

“Just a thought. What’s so important that Tyrion needs your help?” 

“He is working on his winter ball invite for Alys Reyne and he wants to do something big.”

Jaime rolled his eyes, “Reyne? Ha. Dad will love that,” Jaime paused for a minute in thought, “What color are you wearing to the winter ball?”

Cersei raised her brows, this was her chance, an opportunity to break the wheel that has been driving them through the motions for the past month and a half. She stood to leave, “I haven’t been asked so as of now I’m not going,” she kissed his cheek, “I have cheer practice. I’ll talk to you later.”

Jaime watched her leave with his mouth agape. What the hell was that supposed to mean. 

—————————————————

Jaime sprinted through his house after basketball practice, “Mom? mom. MOM?”

“Jaime, what do you need?” His father yelled from his study. 

Jaime sprinted in that direction hoping his mom was with his dad, “Perfect. I found you,” he said upon seeing Joanna sitting on the couch near the fireplace. 

“What do you need?” Tywin questioned, irritated Jaime had caused such a foolish ruckus throughout the house. 

Jaime gave him a boyish grin, “Well, dad, I need mom’s help. Not yours,” he turned to Joanna with a sad look, “I think Cersei is mad at me,” he said with a slight whine. 

Joanna closed the book she was reading and removed her glasses, “Why would she be mad at you? You both seemed fine at dinner last night.”

Jaime gave her a sheepish look, “Well, she was pretty snappy with me earlier and winter ball was mentioned and I think she’s mad I haven’t asked her but she’s my girlfriend so I didn’t think it was necessary. Like I just assumed we were going together.”

“Jaime,” Tywin stated from behind his mahogany desk, “women...” he paused and looked at Joanna who gave him a look that screamed to watch what came out of his mouth, “women really aren’t that complicated. They like the reassurance, whether they need it or not. They ENJOY continuously being courted even after 20 years of marriage. They like the know that you still want them. That being with them isn’t just you staying in your comfort zone and going through the motions. Cersei, as strong headed and self aware and prideful as she is, is the same so apologize and come up with a damn good way to make it up to her.”

Jaime quickly nodded, “Okay. Okay. I think I have an idea. Thanks, Mom,” he said as he jogged out of the room. 

Joanna looked at Tywin, “Well, that little speech wasn’t half bad.”

“I know,” he replied while staring after Jaime with an offended look on his face. 

—————————————————

Meanwhile, Cersei and Tyrion had just finished his “ball-posal” idea for Alys when they ran into Jaime singing and dancing down the hallway. They both began to laugh before Jaime looked up and realized they were watching. 

A confused Jaime stared back, “Uhh hey! I thought you guys were doing that at her place?”

Tyrion stepped forward, “we were supposed to but everything we needed was here and she needs to talk to mom and dad about volunteer hours anyway. Come check out what we did!” He added excitedly. Tyrion led them both back to his room, “so it’s actually kind of basic but we decided it’s something she would love. So we made this sign.” He held it up and it read ‘I DONUT want to go with anyone else’. 

Jaime nodded his head, still kind of lost, “okay? And?”

Cersei rolled her eyes, “She loves donuts. We’re going to make donuts tonight that spell out winter ball with a question mark.”

Jaime raised his brows at Tyrion, “That’s actually really thoughtful. I like it,” he sighed and began chuckling, “but uhh you two are going to home make donuts?” he said as he poked Cersei in the side and continued to laugh. 

She slapped his hand away, “We’re going to try. If it doesn’t work we have a backup order,” she snapped back. 

“Well, I think it sounds nice. I’m sure she’ll love it, bro,” he turned to leave and stopped at the door on his way out, “Cers, I need to talk to you about something.”

“Yeah, ya know T and I really need to get to work on those donuts. It’ll take us a bit to make them,” she said without looking at him. 

Jaime snorted, “It wasn’t a question. Follow me,” he commanded before taking his leave.

Cersei shared a look with Tyrion before shaking her head and following Jaime out. She did her best to look unfazed and bored but inside she was definitely turned on by how commanding he had sounded, it was hot. 

He led her to his room and sat her on the edge of his bed. He walked away and came back with an acoustic guitar. She looked down and smiled, he hadn’t played the guitar in awhile, he also hadn’t sang in forever. As a child he was classically trained on the piano but music was a hobby he happily let die; she absolutely loved it though and he knew that. 

He strung a few chords and flowed into a tune she quickly recognized. He spent the next five minutes serenading her to Mumford & Sons’ Guiding Light. 

He finished and kissed her forehead, “Cersei, would you like to go to the winter ball with me?” he asked softly. 

She pulled back to look him the eyes, “it’s about time you asked. Yes, I would enjoy that.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t ask sooner.”

He kissed her temple, both completely content holding the other in the silence when Tyrion peeked in the door, “I’m glad you two got it sorted out but I def still need help with my ball business.”

The three spent the rest of the night attempting, and failing, to make donuts. They burnt three batches and set the fire alarm off twice, much to Joanna and Tywin’s dismay. Once Tyrion decided it was a sign from God this was destined to fail he went to bed. Jaime saw Cersei out before attempting to cheer up his brother, which was a loss cause. 

The next morning before class, Cersei and Jaime were walking down the hall hand in hand when they stumbled upon Tyrion opening his locker and being hit with confetti. Alys Reyne stood behind him and cheered when he agreed to go to the formal with her. 

“I guess he didn’t need our burnt donuts after all,” Cersei said before they headed to class.


	10. A Nightmare On My Street

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> College aged, like 20ish.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is odd. I’ve been watching waaaay too many horror movies while social distancing. Enjoy!

Jaime was woken from a deep sleep by his phone going off. In a half state of confusion he answered, “Hello?”

A nervous Cersei was on the other line, “Hey, umm, no one else is home and I think there might be someone outside,” she whispered. 

Jaime rolled out of bed, “Yeah, Cers, people sometimes go outside.”

“You know what I mean, jackass. We literally just got the stalker issue handled and the doorbell just randomly rang so don’t mind if I’m a bit freaked.”

“The front gates weren’t locked?” He asked now very alert. 

“They were earlier. I triple checked before locking myself in my room.”

“Shit. Ok, just make sure the doors are locked. I’ll be there in 15. Ya know I bet you’re regretting that slasher movie marathon you decided to have earlier.”

He could practically hear her eyes roll, “Call when you get here,” she said before hanging up. 

Cersei quickly checked the four main entrances to the house and all seemed to be locked and she decided to station herself in the kitchen. Turns out Jaime wasn’t wrong, she was definitely regretting binge watching horror films all day, knowing damn well she’d be home alone tonight. 

She impatiently checked the time on her phone, Jaime should be here any minute. That’s when the paranoia began to sit in, she realized it took her about 10 minutes to check every main entrance, that would’ve been enough time for someone to slip into the house and lock a door that had been left unlocked. She began to imagine if someone had gotten into the house, were they simply sitting back and watching her. A certain unease sat in and she began to pace and her mind began to race; ok, if she was a killer, what entrance would she be at, where would she hide to ensure the protagonist would feel the right amount of discomfort before a sure death. She was pulled from her film inspired thoughts by the doorbell. 

She went to the door and was nearing the handle when her phone rang.

“Hey, I’m outside now but I’m coming around back. Don’t open the front door,” Jaime said with hushed caution. 

Cersei flinched back from the door, “why?”

“Trust me, okay. Come open the door,” he said while gently tapping on the back window. 

Jaime locked the back door and quickly made his way to the front. He checked the peep hole and saw an empty front porch. 

He turned to Cersei, on the surface he was chill, completely calm; inside he was freaking out, “everything is locked, right?”

“Yes...?”

“Okay. Well, I thought I saw something but I think it’s just my lack of sleep,” he lied, hoping she would believe him because he definitely spotted someone on the front porch and now they’re definitely not there anymore. 

Naturally, she saw right through him, “There is someone outside, isn’t there?”

He hesitated before caving, “Yes, they were standing at the front door. I think we should-“ he was cut off by both of their phones alerting them of a notification. 

“It’s a random number. It says open the door.”

“Mines from a random too. It says ‘do you want to play a game?’ Not really, no.”

Cersei made her way to the front door, Jaime quickly jumped in front of her, “Babe, this isn’t Woodsboro and you’re not Sidney Prescott. Don’t open the door,” he pleaded. 

She unlocked the top lock, “It’s a good thing too” she unlocked the bottom lock, “in that movie her boyfriend was the killer,” she finished as she swung the door opened to find find nothing but a note. 

“Let the game begin? That’s all it says,” she sighed as she locked the door back, “What is this Saw? All I wanted was a peaceful night alone. Now I’m being tormented and I’m stuck with you,” she groaned and walked upstairs. 

Jaime sighed and followed her to her room, “So you’re still mad about earlier?”

“Yes,” she yelled, “You ditched our annual scream-o-thon for Brienne and Melara.”

“They’re my lab partners! WE HAD TO FINISH A PROJECT! I didnt want to bail on you BUT WE CANT FAIL,” He yelled back hoping to get the point across. 

“Whatever,” They sat in silence for a minute before Cersei looked at him in urgent realization, “You got a text from a blocked number too.”

“Yes?”

“That means whoever it is knows US, they know I would’ve called YOU,” she paused, genuinely scared for the first time all night, “Jaime, I don’t know who’s doing this. It’ll take the cops 15 minutes to get here, sure they were trespassing but how will they find whoever it is the property is so big and text messages don’t really warrant a police investigation.” She was on the brink of stress crying. 

He reached for her hand, in an attempt to calm her, “We should leave. You can come back to my house and we can figure this out when everyone gets home,” he said as he pulled her in for a hug. 

They made their way back down stairs when Jaime got a message, “You can’t leave yet. The fun is just beginning,” he read. 

Jaime turned to Cersei who was already on the phone with the 911 operator, “She said she can try to track the number and get a location,” she told him as she turned it on speaker. 

“Miss Langston, I’ve tracked it and the messages are coming from inside the house.”

There was a pregnant pause as Cersei and Jaime stared at each other, the operator forgotten as she said she’d send a patrol car over. They both went to take a step when a dark figure emerged from the shadows, “You two were always annoying as hell,” it spoke through the darkness. 

Jaime took a step in front of Cersei, “Who are you?”

“The proud lord said...,cute Lannister,” the figure chuckled before removing his hood, “it’s just me.”

“Euron?”

“In the flesh, I initially came to have a little fun with your girlfriend but as soon as I heard her call you I decided to make it a game.”

“That’s sadistic and disgusting,” Cersei snorted. 

“Your fathers screwed mine over and then had the audacity to bankrupt him. THAT is sadistic and disgusting,” he yelled, “I only wanted them to feel as empty and useless as I have for the past six months,” he began to pace and speak as though this was rehearsed, “Of course, choosing which one of you to torment wasn’t easy. Don’t get me wrong I wanted to go for you, Jaime, but Cersei was the better target, the easier target; I found out she would be home alone all night. I figured if I hurt her, both of your parents would feel pretty small, useless, YOU would feel insufficient, like a failure; the same things I’ve been feeling since your parents ripped the rug out from under us, thus I decided I would finally have her,” he added now standing toe to toe with Jaime while staring at Cersei. 

Jaime’s hands connected with Euron’s shoulders as he shoved him back and growled, “Over my dead body.”

Euron laughed, “That’s my intention.”

“What do you want, Euron?” Cersei asked while gripping the back of Jaime’s shirt. 

Euron waved a knife around “Initially, Cersei, I just wanted you but he’s here now and I could be the man that kills Jaime Lannister...”

He was interrupted by two officers busting through the door, “Everybody freeze. Sir, lower the knife,” one said while aiming his gun. 

Once they got Euron in cuffs and into the back of the cop car, Cersei collapsed into Jaime’s arms sobbing, “He was in the house, on the grounds, all night,” she said through tears. 

Jaime held her tightly as he attempted to calm her, “I will never bail on you again, ever,” he promised as she sobbed into his shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m really not sure what to write next so if you guys have any ideas drop them in the comments! 🤪


	11. Summer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The summer before high school.

Summer break was always Jaime’s favorite. They took off to the Hamptons for two months, leaving the hustle and bustle of the city behind. This also meant his old friend Bronn was back from boarding school abroad, of course his sister came too. They’re parents pulled them from Lannisport Prep 3 years ago hoping to further their cultural knowledge before high school. The families came together every summer to sort of reconnect. 

Their three months spent on the beach and soaking up the sun while attending posh dinner parties was beginning to wrap up. Tomorrow everything went back to normal, the Lannisters would retreat back to Casterly Rock and the Langstons would fly back to their Chateau in France. 

Jaime was particularly saddened, not only because his best friend was leaving for another 9 months but because he had taken a fancy to Cersei. Up until this summer he had absolutely hated her, stating on more than one occasion she was the biggest bitch he knew. The feeling was mutual, of course, she frequently pointed out how big of a cocky asshole he was. However, this all changed about a week into summer when they both got food poisoning and we’re stuck in the house together. Everything he’s done since then had been to please her or to maintain her attention, much to the annoyance of Bronn and Tyrion. 

The annual 3 on 3 game? He bailed because Cersei wanted to sit on the beach. The Starks social gathering? He ditched because Cersei didn’t like the color scheme. 4th of July? He left Tyrion’s beach party before it even started to sit with her under the stars and watch fireworks. He even passed on taking girls, who definitely wanted his attention, to a swimming hole because Cersei had rolled her eyes when Bronn mentioned it. He had it bad. 

Cersei was sitting poolside reading War and Peace, watching Jaime tread water. She couldn’t deny she enjoyed the attention he had given her the past three months but she knew better than to get attached. In 36 hours they would be on opposite sides of the world so there was no use in investing anything into a summer fling. She would never admit it aloud but she thinks she’s developed a crush on him. He was hot, no doubt, his change in attitude towards her helped as well. 

She was pulled from her thoughts by Tyrion, “Hey, losers, the parents said dinner is in 30. They have an announcement to make.”

Thirty minutes later they were all seated around a sandalwood table when Celeste and Joanna both stood to speak, “We have some news to share with you guys,” Joanna directed at the teenagers. 

Celeste gave a big smile to Bronn and Cersei, “Joanna and I have decided to merge our practices in New York.”

Bronn nodded, “Dang, mom, that’s rough. You’ll come visit us in France though, right?”

“No, sweetheart, we’re moving to New York.”

“You and dad are just going to pack up and leave us? Well, alright, Cers and I can definitely manage. We’ll visit you, okay?” He said fully convinced his parents were leaving them on the other side of the planet. 

Cersei rolled her eyes, “Bronn, I think we’re ALL moving to New York.” 

“What? What about the chateau and all my French babes? What am I supposed to tell them?”

Tyrion clapped his shoulder, “Long distance works. Also Upper East Side debutantes will love you, right Jaime?” He said looking for confirmation from his brother but Jaime neither agreed nor disagreed he just stared at Cersei with a lovesick smile, knowing what he initially thought was unattainable was suddenly within his grasp. 

Eventually, Bronn accepted he didn’t have an option but to move back to New York and the rest of dinner went as usual. 

Once dinner was finished Cersei excused herself, “I am going for a walk before nightfall.”

Jaime stood embarrassingly quick, knocking over his chair as he did so, “I’ll come. I need the fresh air and you shouldn’t be out by yourself,” he added as he followed her out. 

Tywin’s eyes followed him as he chased Cersei like a lost dog, “He has taken quite a liking to her.”

Bartholomew watched them walk out the door and shook his head, “Honestly, it’s better than their usual hatred and bickering.”

Bronn sighed, “It’s kind of annoying honestly. I’ve lost my best mate to my blasted sister. I can’t wait to see how this progresses once we make the move,” he begrudgingly added. 

Outside, Cersei had reached the edge of the deck, where the sand begins. Jaime walked and stood beside her, “You’ll love New York. You’ll be queen b at Lannisprep in no time. Honestly, with social medias it’s like you guys never moved, you’re still a hot topic. Like a modern Serena Van Der Woodsen,” he said with a reassuring smile as he tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear, “only prettier.”

She smiled, “Let’s discuss that,” she said as she started walking. 

He jogged after her, “discuss what?” He questioned playfully. 

“This. You and me. Me and you,” she responded looking him up and down expectantly. 

He shyly ran a hand through his hair, “I like you. A lot.” he stuttered out nervously. 

She gave a triumphant grin, “Good. I like you too.”

They stared into each other’s eyes with massive grins before she pulled him in for a kiss. After about 30 seconds, they broke off for air and he grinned at her and gave a content sigh, “That was our first kiss,” she nodded along, “soooo do you want to be my girlfriend?” he asked sheepishly, kind of worried she would shoot him down. 

She was just about to answer when Tyrion and Bronn ran up on them, “Guys, Stark challenged us to a game of beach volleyball. Let’s go.” 

Jaime was still looking at her waiting for an answer, she grabbed his hand, “Yes, you can be my boyfriend,” she confidently said before pulling him in the direction of the game.


	12. Neighbors Know My Name

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They’re 17-18 years old in this one. Enjoy it!

Bronn rolled off Roslin, completely spent when they heard it through the walls, a loud groan and a high pitched “Oh God”. This was followed by a rhythmic knocking. 

She looked at Bronn, questionably, “Either Cersei is just a screamer or Lannister is as good in bed as everyone assumes he is.”

“I guarantee I’m better,” he said before pouncing on her again only to be interrupted by Cersei yelling, “Yes, Jaime. Right there.”

Bronn rolled out of the bed and threw on his boxers, “You have got to be kidding me,” as he flung open his door and headed down the hallway. Roslin has covered herself with a sheet and followed him out. 

He swung Cersei’s door opened just in time for Cersei to moan Jaime’s name loudly as he slapped the headboard. 

Bronn stood at the foot of the bed, shocked. They were both sporting glasses, fully clothed, and Jaime was using Cersei as a body pillow while she peer reviewed his literature paper. 

Neither bothered to look up when Bronn asked, “You’re not even having sex?” 

Jaime groaned and rolled to put his face in between Cersei’s covered breasts, “Ha. He wishes,” she stated with a dry laugh as she ran her free hand through Jaime’s hair, “We have a book review due tomorrow first period. Or did you forget?” She asked over the the rim of her glasses. 

Bronn shook his head, “So the moaning and banging was fake? You assholes killed the mood!” He yelled before storming out and slamming the door. 

Jaime sat up, “The fake moans and groans, absolutely genius, and ridiculously...hot,” he slowly removed her glasses and took his paper out of her hand, “how about we take a study break.” He suggested as he began to suck on her neck. 

One hand had made its way under her shirt as he drew circles on her nipples, this elicited a throaty groan from her, “fine. make it worth my while.”

“Oh, I always do,” he said as he worked her out of her clothes and quickly removed his. 

He sat above her, her legs wrapped round his waist, as he basked in all her glory. While he watched her, she slowly slithered her hand down to finger her clit. They never broke eye contact as he took his throbbing cock and slowly moved it inside of her. 

They both let out a sigh of relief, feeling whole once again, before he began thrusting. 

She began to squirm, he was pumping in and out at an agonizingly slow pace and the devilish grin on his face said he knew what he was doing. He brought his head down to suck on her neck, “you’re such a good girl, so patient,” he said as he thrusted his cock deep within in. That hit the spot and pulled a loud moan from her but she was growing impatient so she quickly flipped them over. She began to ride him fast and hard, his hands came to rest on her hips and he met her thrusts with an equal amount of force. 

“Jaime. Oh god. Jaime. Jaime. I’m about to...go harder. JAIME,” she began to moan and shout. 

He flipped them back over and began pounding in and out of her, “Cers, you’re so hot. I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna cum.”

Her walls began to clinch around him and he could feel her wet, heat engulf his cock as she came while taking his name in vain and leaving sharp scratches down his back. This drove him over the edge as he spilled inside of her and continued to ride it out as she groaned underneath him. He collapsed on top of her, head rested in the crook of her neck. 

She began to stroke her hand down his back slowly, “I love you,” she said comfortingly with her lips pressed against his head.

He nodded and kept his mouth pressed against her neck, “I know,” he said cockily, “do you think the neighbors know my name?”


	13. Life of the Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Late senior year of high school.

It was Bronn’s birthday and his parents were out of town, the entire school knew that meant a rager at the Langston’s. Cersei had spent the day sulking in anticipation of all the people that would be in her house. In response, Jaime had spent the day attempting to convince her that it would be fun. 

Bronn found them both sitting alone at lunch, “I see you ditched your respective cliques for a quiet lunch today,” he clapped Jaime’s shoulders, “the entire school has been invited, phase one of the lost weekend is a go!”

Cersei gave Jaime a wide eyed look as he flicked his lunch with his fork, “a lost weekend? Seriously?”

Jaime sighed, “I promised him. I’m all yours Sunday afternoon...and at tonight’s party. Also, it’s not like we won’t be in the same house all weekend,” he said as he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, earning him an eye roll.

“No. No. No. You are NOT sneaking out on a lost weekend for a quick fuck. It’s not happening, Lannister,” Bronn said threateningly before walking off. 

Cersei and Jaime ended lunch early and started the trek to their next class, “Sooo the infamous lost weekend is back...” she stated as she grabbed his hand. 

He used that as leverage to pull her in closer and wrap an arm around her waist, “Yessss but the only things that will be on these lips is a bottle of alcohol and YOU,” he whispered in her ear before pressing her against a locker and kissing her. 

She wasn’t happy but the way his tongue worked over hers made it hard to be mad at him. His right hand had moved its way to groping her ass and his left hand was playing at the hem of her shirt when she pulled away. 

She rested her forehead on his, “Hey, hotshot, we’re in the middle of the hallway. Not here.”

“I don’t know. I think here would be hot,” he said with closed eyes and shit eating grin. 

“Maybe later,” she purred as she kissed his cheek and walked away, leaving him to stare at her swaying hips. 

—————————————————

Bronn stood in front of his parents’ in house bar trying to decide which they were least likely to notice missing when he saw Cersei walking down the hallway.

“Hey, I need to talk to you about something,” he said still rummaging through the liquor. 

She stood, annoyed, in the doorway, “What?”

He grabbed three random bottles and turned to look at her, “Jaime. He’s my best friend and it’s my birthday. I want full custody this weekend.”

She hesitated, “Personally, I think he should get to decide who he spends his time with but fine,” she calmly said, “You don’t get him for the next two weekends though,” she finished smugly before walking away. 

Bronn rolled his eyes, “Sounds like a deal, sister,” he replied to the empty room before he heard the doorbell sound. 

He slowly closed the cabinets back when a voice startled him, “Hey idiot, you think he won’t notice 3 of the biggest bottles missing?”

He kept his back turned, “Try more like hoping he won’t care. You’re here early, what’s wrong with you?”

“I rode with Jaime and he had some other business to take care of, I think.”

Bronn spun around quickly to face Tyrion, “Well, he better take care of it quickly. She said he’s mine this weekend and people are set to arrive in about an hour.”

They walked around the house and eventually found Jaime and Cersei playing a round of pool in the game room, “Damn, Jaime if you shoot that bad tonight you can find a different partner,” Tyrion mouthed. 

By 11:30 Jaime and Bronn had started a game of boom cup and the massive house was packed with schoolmates and random people that hadn’t been invited, much to Cersei’s dismay, “He had to throw a rager, it couldn’t have just been a small kickback,” she complained to herself as she made her way to the wine cellar, “ugh, what am I, the beer wench?”

She walked back into the party with a crate of premium beer when she, literally, ran into Oberyn Martell. He caught her before she could completely crash, “Cersei! Hey! Nice party you’re throwing!” He drunkenly yelled. 

“It’s not mine. Do you mind helping me?” She said lifting the beer in his direction.

“Sure sure,” He said as he chugged his drink and took them from her, “Where are we headed?”

“Just follow me,” she replied as she weaved through the crowd back to Jaime and Bronn. 

Bronn was nowhere in sight but finding Jaime was easy. He was outside and had just jumped on the counter of the pool bar and was currently swinging his shirt in the air like a propeller. He let he shirt fly and a very embarrassed Brienne caught it with her face. To every females’ enjoyment, except for Cersei’s, he was on the brink of doing a strip tease when he noticed Oberyn standing very close to Cersei. 

“Hey, Martell, back the fuck up,” Jaime slurred while pointing a finger. 

Cersei quickly stepped in to diffuse the situation. She grabbed his finger and held it in her grasp as he stepped off the bar, “Hi,” she said flirtatiously while stroking his cheek, “you’re drunk. Don’t do this,” she calmly commanded. 

He cutely squinted and touched his nose to her nose, “You’re right. Will you...go upstairs with me?” 

She grabbed his hand, “Yes, I will,” she sweetly said while pulling him away from the crowd, “Martell, take that to Bronn,” she yelled before disappearing up a spiral stair case near the pool. 

—————————————————

Everyone knows drunk Jaime as the life of the party, but Cersei knows the real drunk Jaime, and it’s not her favorite. 

He had pulled her into her room and started a heated make out session, managing to get her out of her shirt before he urgently pulled away and sprinted into her bathroom. 

“Cersei, I’m dying,” he cried as he sat on the ground beneath her with his head in a trash can. 

She rubbed his back, “No, you’re not dying. You drank too much...again,” she retorted with an eye roll. 

“Fuck Bronn and Tyrion and Addam and Stannis if they hadn’t suggested we play...” his statement was cut short by another gag. 

She was beginning to comfort him but was interrupted by a knock on the door, “Lannister, get out here!” Addam yelled through the door. 

Jaime pulled his face out of the bucket, “One second,” he slurred before throwing up again. 

There was another aggressive knock, “Cersei, I have custody this weekend. Quit banging my friend,” Bronn yelled. 

What happened next, happened so quickly Cersei didn’t really have time to comprehend it. Bronn flung the door opened and simultaneously Jaime shoved the bucket in her hand and grabbed her hair. This motion made her head go downward, staring straight at consequences of Jaime’s actions. The mere sight of his throw up was enough to gag her. 

Bronn walked into the bathroom to find them like that, “Wow, Cers, can’t hold your alcohol tonight?” He said with a laugh. 

Jaime nodded while rubbing circles on her back, “Yes, poor thing pushed the limits tonight. I would love to come join the party but I should stay and help her.” 

Bronn shook his head, “party foul, Cersei. Lost weekend festivities continue as soon as she’s asleep,” he added before leaving. 

Jaime stood and helped Cersei up. She glared at him while he searched her drawers for the toothbrush he kept there, “I’m taking a shower,” she said with an angry undertone. 

“Can I join?” He asked with a mouthful of toothpaste. 

She threw him an incredulous look, “No.”

She got out of the shower to find Jaime asleep in the middle of her bed, “I win this round, Bronn,” she laughed to herself before climbing into bed.


	14. Tonight is the Night

Cersei sat at the pool flipping through Vogue when her mother approached her, “Cersei, darling, your father and I need your help tonight...”

“Okay...” Cersei replied curiously while removing her sunglasses. 

“The Bakers are in from Maine. Your father and I are having dinner with them tonight to, hopefully, complete a property sale. They don’t want to leave their daughter alone in the city. Would you be willing to go hang out with her?” Celeste asked cautiously. 

Cersei sighed heavily, “like babysit her?” 

“No, for heavens sake, she’s 15 all you have to do is go to the city and hang out either at her place or the penthouse,” she replied as she stood, “if you go to the penthouse, Bronn should be there so you wouldn’t be alone,” she added with a threatening smile before walking back into the house. 

Cersei left with her parents about an hour later to meet the Bakers. She had messaged Bronn, who notified her that he’s having a small gathering, before agreeing to take her to the Langston penthouse. 

They waited outside the hotel door for a few minutes before a petite girl in a shin length dress opened the door, “Hello, you must be the Langstons. I’m Layla Baker,” she greeted Bart and Celeste with an extended hand, “come in. My parents will be out soon.”

The Baker’s entered the room a few moments later and exchanged greetings but before they left they gave Layla, and Cersei, a few warnings: No boys, no booze, 12:00 curfew.

Cersei thought this girl seemed innocent enough in her nun outfit and kind demeanor so she was definitely surprised when the girl went to her room and came back in a dress so short and heels so high Cersei felt scandalized. 

“I’m going out. Feel free to come. There’s an exclusive pent party on the Upper East Side and I got in. And tonight is the night I lose my virginity,” Layla confidently said before walking out the door. 

Cersei frantically walked after her while trying to get Bronn to answer her calls. She eventually resorted to calling Jaime, “Hey! I need some help!”

“Cers, I’m all about banging you but don’t you think it’s a little early for a booty call?” He said with a laugh. 

“Cute but no. I’m babysitting and the kid just ran out of the house looking for some exclusive party on the UES. Thought you might know something about it since Bronn mentioned a gathering and won’t answer my calls.” 

“You’ve been there 5 minutes and have already lost the kid,” he replied laughing, “the mother of my future children, ladies and gents. Anyway, yeah, Bronn mentioned it and Tyrion drug me to it.”

“SO THE PARTY IS AT MY PENTHOUSE?! I’ll be there in 10.” She replies frustrated before calling her driver. 

Cersei walked off the elevator into the penthouse and decided she wasn’t sure who she was going to kill first, Layla or Bronn. ‘Small gathering’ her ass, Bronn never did anything halfway and partying wasn’t an exception. 

She eventually found Bronn and Layla playing pool. She grabbed Bronn by the ear and pulled him closer as he whined, “you do realize mom and dad are hosting the gala after party here tomorrow night, right?” She questioned through gritted teeth. 

“Cersei, honey, calm down. Get a drink,” he pointed across the room, “there’s Jaime, hop on his dick. Find a way to chill out, right?” He said before asking Layla for confirmation. 

“Bronn, she’s 15. I’m babysitting her.” Cersei replied with a wicked smile. 

Bronn looked at her with a raised brows, “you’re 15?” he asked before pulling away, “you’re a shitty babysitter,” he told Cersei with a laugh before going to get another drink. 

Layla was fuming, “YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS,” she whined, “you’re not my babysitter, you’re a cockblock,” she said before storming away, looking for another guy. 

Cersei rolled her eyes and sighed before someone wrapped their arms around her, “she seems like a joy,” Jaime whispered. 

“She wasn’t bad for the first 10 minutes, now she’s trying to pimp herself out.”

Jaime laughed, “what? why?”

“She wants to lose her virginity. Tonight. As soon as possible,” she replied as she turned in his arms, “I have to find her. Before she makes a mistake,” she finished before kissing his cheek and walking off. 

She searched the party and walked circles for 45 minutes and was just about to give up when Jaime approached her, “I think I saw her go upstairs towards the bedrooms.”

She grabbed his hand and drug him upstairs, “You better be kidding. If she loses her virginity IN MY BED. I’ll kill her.” 

They burst through Cersei’s bedroom door to find Layla sitting on the bed, “What are you doing in here?! Surge is in the bathroom. We’re about to have sex.”

Cersei and Jaime shared a look, “Surge? You’re going to lose your virginity to a boy named Surge?” Cersei asked as she followed Jaime to the bathroom. 

Jaime pushed the door opened and saw Surge in all his glory before laughing, “Dude, she’s 15. Get out of here.”

As Surge was gathering his clothes and running out, Cersei sat down by Layla, “Surge looked like a tool; you’re welcome. Why was losing your virginity to a random guy so important tonight?”

“Muffie. She’s in my class. I needed to lose it before her, to keep a higher status. You know, high school hierarchy,” a defeated Layla answered. 

“Muffie Bronson?” Jaime asked. 

Cersei shot him a questioning look and Layla looked up, “Yes. How do you know her?”

Jaime held eye contact with Cersei, “I don’t know her but I do know she lost her virginity earlier in the night.”

Cersei, thinking Jaime took it, nodded with a judgmental look, “oh did she?”

Jaime rolled his eyes knowing what she was playing at, “Yeah, in the back of my limo...” he hesitated for dramatic effect and to get a rise out of Cersei. 

“In the back of YOUR limo?” Cersei asked. 

At the same time, Layla said, “Oh my gosh. Muffie lost her v-card to Jaime Lannister?!”

Jaime died laughing, “No, no, no. Muffie lost her ‘v-card’ in the back of my limo to my brother, Tyrion,” he approached Cersei, “I would bang a lot of people in a lot of places, but I consider the back of a limo sacred,” he said before kissing her forehead, reminiscing on their first time. 

Cersei pulled away and looked at Layla, “We don’t know each other well but I need you to know sex and losing your virginity isn’t something you should rush. It shouldn’t be a competition between you and Muffie the Lacrosstitute. It should be with someone you’re comfortable with. Someone you love,” she added grabbing Jaime’s hand. 

Layla mugged Cersei with a hug, “Thank you...for saving me tonight. For not letting me go through with that. I appreciate it,” she stood to leave, “for what it’s worth, you’ve been the best babysitter I’ve ever had,” she added before leaving the room. 

Cersei watched as she left the room and felt the bed shift as Jaime sat next to her. He rested his chin on her shoulder, “You are going to be an incredible mother,” he said as he kissed her cheek. 

She turned to hug him, “I don’t think I’ve ever told you this but I’m really happy my first time was with you...even if it was in the back of a limo after a gala our parents hosted,” she whispered in his ear. 

He pecked at her cheek, “we could always recreate it right here,” he said as he attempted to lay her down on the bed. 

“Not right now. The night is young, I’m technically still babysitting. Let’s go,” she said pulling him off the bed and back to the party.


	15. For the First Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 15-16ish here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lowkey disappointed in this one. I feel like it should’ve been better but please enjoy it anyway!

Jaime sat next to Bronn and pretended to listen while scanning the room for his better half. He hadn’t seen much of her today. It was his mother’s event so he was expected to sit next to his family, not be glued to Cersei’s hip. To his fortune, the annual brunch was simmering down and people were beginning to take their leave. He finally spotted her and managed to make and hold eye contact before she smirked and turned away. 

“Dude? Are you even listening to me?” Bronn asked as he punched his shoulder. 

Jaime shook himself from the trance, “Yeah, yeah. I’m listening.”

“No you’re not. You’re eyeing my sister. You sure do pine after her a lot for a guy who has never even tapped it” Bronn said with a laugh, “I’m allowed to say that because she’s my sister. I, of all people, know how much she loves you thus, as her brother, I am giving you permission to bang that.”

Jaime stood to walk away, “You...are so weird. I’m going to find her now.”

The crowd had dwindled but Jaime was still walking circles around the ballroom trying to find Cersei. He stood near the exit, perplexed. “Where could she have gone? Surely she wouldn’t have left without saying goodbye,” he asked himself under his breath. 

He felt two small arms circle around his waist, “She didn’t. She’s just had a long morning,” Cersei said as she rested cheek on his back. 

Jaime grabbed her hands, “Would she like to go home?” He asked, slightly concerned. 

“She would. She has a limo out front. Would you like to ride with her?” She asked as he turned to look at her. 

“Yes. Are you okay?” He asked cupping her face. 

Cersei pulled him through the exit and towards the limo “I’m fine. I just have a slight headache. My mother has been on me about cotillion lately.”

“Well, let me have to honor of cheering you up,” Jaime said as they crawled into the backseat, “take us to Casterly Rock,” he said to the driver before putting the privacy window down. 

Cersei turned to embrace him, “I love you,” she said before innocently kissing his lips. 

They kept it PG for a few minutes before Cersei tested the water by opening her mouth and letting her tongue trace his lips. Jaime reacted eagerly as he opened his mouth and allowed her full entrance while tangling his fingers in her hair. Jaime was able to slither a hand up Cersei’s dress and fondle her breasts while she unbuttoned his shirt. Jaime kept one hand teasing her nipple and the other began massaging her over her underwear. They both pulled away for air when Jaime noticed Cersei eyeing his belt line. 

He smiled and kissed her cheek, “If you want to, I want to but don’t feel pressured.”

Cersei smiled softly and resumed their make out session. Her hands traveled down his exposed torso and began working at his belt. Once his pants were unzipped she pulled away from him and watched as her hands worked teasingly slow over his underwear waistband. He watched her with hooded eyes before he lifted the hem of her dress and helped her pull it over her head. He quickly unclasped her bra and his mouth immediately found her tits. She leaned back and he moved with her, working to make himself comfortable on top of her. 

She slowly slid her hand under his waistline to feel his thick, exposed cock. He bucked into her hand with moan, aside from his own hand, she was the first to touch him and he loved it. 

He looked her in the eye, breathing heavily, “Are you sure?”

In response she wrapped her legs around his waist, “Are YOU sure?”

He nodded, kissed her chest, and began stroking her with his fingers, “You’re so wet. It’s hot,” he moaned in her ear as he quickly moved his fingers in and out of her. She began to squirm under him and batted his hand away before she ran her hand down his member. She slowly guided his tip to her entrance and let him thrust his hips into hers. 

They both let out moans of ecstasy, both feeling complete as they threw their heads back before pausing. 

“Holy shit. I’m actually inside of you,” Jaime observed before he started awkwardly rocking his hips. 

At first their rhythm was off but after a few thrusts and words of encouragement from both they worked in harmony. 

Jaime thrusted at a decent pace until he felt Cersei’s walls begin to tighten around him, “Faster. Jaime, go faster.” She commanded as her nails raked down his back. He was happy to oblige as he began pounding so hard he was afraid she might split in two. She began to squirm as her walls tightened and her hips were thrusting to meet his eagerly. 

Jaime began to see stars, “Cersei, Cers. Hell yes,” he moaned as he came. Simultaneously, Cersei screamed, “Oh my god. Yes, Jaime,” as she came. 

Jaime brought his head down to kiss and suck on her neck, “That was incredible. I love you” he said as he rested his head on her chest while still inside of her. 

Cersei closed her eyes and ran a finger through his hair, “I love you, Jaime Lannister.”

He looked up at her with squinted eyes and boyish grin as he began to work his hips over hers again, “do you want to try for round two?” he asked in a husky whisper. 

Cersei laughed, “We have sex one time and now you have satyriasis.”

Jaime finally pulled himself out and was met with a wimper as he sat up. He rested his hand on her stomach, “Does this mean we can have sex anytime? Because that was great!” he asked enthusiastically. 

Cersei sat up and rolled her eyes, “I’ll think about it. Hand me my dress. I’m sure we’re almost to Casterly Rock.”

Once they were both redressed Jaime pulled her into his lap and gave her a sloppy kiss on the cheek, “I hope that made your day better.”

Cersei cupped his cheek with her hand and pulled him in for a kiss, “It did,” she said as she rested her forehead against his, “And I’m glad my first time was with you...even if we are in the back of a limo.”


	16. With Arms Wide Open

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys are doing well! Here’s another update, they’re like mid-20s here. Enjoy! Comment what you might want to see next!! (ps I promise I’m working on the next chapter for Paging Dr Lannister(s).)

Tywin Lannister had just finished his speech for the philanthropy society and the gala was beginning to wrap up. Cersei found herself in conversation with Oberyn Martell and Addam Marbrand when Jaime approached them. 

“Do you mind if I borrow her for a moment,” he asked looking Oberyn up and down as he pulled Cersei away, “You look gorgeous! I feel like I haven’t seen you all week,” he said as he twirled her around to get the full fairy tail effect. 

Cersei smiled, “Thank you. You look handsome,” she complimented as he pulled her to his chest. 

Jaime stared at her with a soft smile for a few moments, “Since I drove here, would you like to ride with me to the Four Seasons for the after party?”

Cersei hesitated, “Umm sure. I’ll call my driver and tell him to leave. I need to talk to you about something anyway,” Cersei unraveled herself from his arms, “I’ll be right back,” she added before she strolled away to talk with Oberyn Martell again. 

Jaime watched her as she carried a close conversation with Martell; he had been following her around like a puppy all night. He tried not to freak out, she had assured him on several different occasions that Oberyn was just a friend, nothing more. However, he felt as though she had been avoiding him all week; she bailed on lunch plans, hadn’t come over to the house, took more calls with Tyrion than she had him; he was mildly concerned. He brushed it off when she made her way back to him, “Are you ready?” She asked as she secured her hand in his. 

He led her out to his car and opened the passenger door for her. They sat in an uncomfortable silence before Jaime sighed deeply and decided to break it. 

He went to grab her hand but she slowly pulled away, avoiding physical contact. Jaime looked at her with a confused gaze, “I was going to be nice about this but what’s your deal?” he asked in a harsh tone. 

Cersei put up her shield and plastered a faux confused look on her face, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

He let out a sharp laugh, “You have been avoiding me all week. You ditched our lunch plans to work on something with Tyrion. You’re buddy/buddy with Oberyn Martell. We haven’t had sex in a month. Hell, I haven’t touched you in three weeks. We haven’t been ALONE in nearly two weeks; you started sleeping at your own apartment, what the hell is going on,” he said in a heated voice. He took a deep breath to calm himself, “Are you over this? Are we done? Do you not want to get married?” Jaime asked in an unsteady voice, fearing she was done with him. 

Cersei let out a sigh and raked her fingers through her hair, “Jaime...I’ve been going through something. I-“

“What? If you tell me you’re cheating on me with Martell I swear I’ll wreck this fucking car.” 

Cersei looked at him and smirked at his possessiveness, “No, don’t be reckless. I’m not cheating on you,” she yelled back. 

“Bullshit!” He yelled back, “What else would have you acting distant and completely avoiding me then suddenly ‘needing to talk to me’. Cers, if you want to cancel the wedding just say so,” he continued on in a raised voice. 

“Damn it, Jaime, thats not it. Unfortunately, I love you, you stubborn asshat,” she yelled before pausing, “I missed my period,” she whispered before turning to look out the window to avoid his gaze. 

Jaime slammed on the breaks, jerking them both forward. He whipped his head in her direction, “You what?” he asked, shocked. 

“Around the time I got off birth control, we were really irresponsible and didn’t use protection then I missed my period. I might be pregnant,” she said in a tone most mothers use when explaining things to their toddlers. 

Jaime pulled his car into the lot before looking at her. His face had softened as did his tone, “Seriously?” he asked as he wiped a tear that had fallen off her cheek, “We are going to be parents?”

Cersei turned her head and placed a soft kiss on the palm of his hand, “I said I MIGHT be pregnant. Oberyn noticed I was acting weird a few weeks ago and guessed it out of me during a lab. We’ve been ‘buddies’ because he was the only one who knew and he was able to inconspicuously get me this,” she said as she held up a pregnancy test. 

Jaime felt as though he had been punched in the chest, “Why didn’t you tell me? Why did you choose to confide in him?”

Cersei’s face fell upon seeing how her decision had impacted him, “I didn’t want to bother you with it until I was 100% sure. You’ve been busy with work and helping plan the philanthropy event. I didn’t need you more stressed than you already have been. I also wasn’t sure how you would react; you’ve mentioned on several occasions that you’re not ready for a family. I know I should’ve told you but I didn’t and I’m sorry. I wasn’t sure how to handle it myself, let alone sure of how you wouldn’t handle it,” she replied regretfully, tears flowing freely as she realized he was genuinely hurt by that. 

Jaime hit his head on the steering wheel before getting out of the car. He walked to her side and helped her out before leading her to the entrance of the hotel. Cersei was nervous, she had thought of hundreds of different scenarios of how he would react but none of them involved him going completely silent. 

Before they entered the ballroom for the after party he pulled her aside, “I understand what your thought process was but I’m not pleased. We’re going to be married, Mr. and Mrs. Lannister MARRIED, in a few months I need you to tell me these things, I need you to confide in ME, not Oberyn, not Tyrion, Me. And for you I promise to be more present and to work on my stress levels,” he looked down and played with the engagement ring on her hand, “if you don’t mind being a little late to this afterparty, I would really like to know what that pregnancy test says.”

Ten minutes had passed since Cersei had exited the restroom but neither could build up the courage to check the results. 

Jaime pulled her in for a hug, “We need to know. For the sake of my sanity, your wellbeing, our future,” he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, “tell me what it says.”

Cersei studied his face before looking at the results. Simultaneously, he opened his eyes as she beamed a brilliant smile. 

“Before I tell you the results, ideally, what do you want them to be?”

“Honestly, if you’re happy then I’m happy.”

Cersei hugged him tightly and whispered softly in his ear, “Jaime, you’re going to be a father.”

He pulled back and looked at her as though he was seeing her for the first time. His world was spinning in the best way possible. He gave her the same smile he gave when she agreed to first be his girlfriend all those years ago before he gently touched her stomach and pulled her in for a kiss. 

“I love you and regardless of what I’ve said in the past I’ll greet this new chapter and this little life we’ve created with arms wide open.”


	17. My Little Girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime and Cersei mid-upper 40s, Myrcella 17ish

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoy this! I am running out of scenarios to write so if you have anything you’d like to read drop a suggestion!

Cersei and Myrcella we’re sitting in the dining room having breakfast when Jaime walked in and threw something on the table. They both nonchalantly looked down and quickly looked up in horror. 

“Don’t worry. I’ve got this,” Cersei whispered to Myrcella as Jaime sat down. 

“DAD. I CAN EXPLAIN,” Myrcella blurted out nervously. 

Jaime shot her a weird look, “Myrcella, I don’t need you to explain. I know what birth control does,” he looked at Cersei with a smirk, “I didn’t realize you were back on it.”

Cersei nodded along, “I am. I did it for your birthday...that was three months ago,” she said, praying he would buy the lie, “I don’t think this is a conversation we should have in front of Myrcella.”

Myrcella stood, “Ya know, she’s right. I am going to take my breakfast to go,” she said grabbing an apple and walking out the door. 

“Wait. If you’re on the pill again, why are we still using condoms,” Jaime asked with a confused look on his face. 

Cersei gave him a blank stare. 

Jaime stared back at her, “MYRCELLA!!!” he yelled running after her. 

Jaime sprinted to the front door to block Myrcella’s exit, Cersei chasing behind him. 

He eyed his wife and daughter, “What. Is. Going. On.” He asked frantically. 

Cersei stepped forward and cupped his face with her hands, hoping to calm him, “She’s 17. She has a boyfriend-“

Jaime placed his hands on Cersei’s hips in an attempt to ground himself before realization sat in and he whipped his head out of Cersei’s hands, “so you’re having sex?” He rhetorically asked Myrcella.

Myrcella looked back at him with wide eyes and a gaping mouth before eyeing Cersei for help. 

“I bet Ned and Cat don’t know what Robb and Cella have been up to. I’m calling them,” he said as he walked into the living room pulling out his phone. 

“Mom, you have GOT to stop him,” Myrcella pleaded. 

“I think it’s too late,” she replied as Jaime joined them at the door again. 

He threw an arm around both of them leading them out the door, “Get in the car. We’re going to see the Starks,” he said with an amused look. 

The three of them stood at the Starks’ front door twenty minutes later. Jaime stood with his hands in his pockets, whistling, patiently waiting; Cersei had her hand locked in his, blankly staring into space; Myrcella stood on Jaime’s other side, torn between embarrassment, anger, and nervousness. 

Catelyn finally opened the door and greeted them. The three Lannisters stood in the foyer standing face to face with the three Starks. There was an awkward pause before Jaime spoke up, “It has been brought to my attention that our children have been participating in sexual intercourse,” he spoke semi professionally. 

Ned stared at Jaime with look that said ‘you can’t be serious. I know what you did at their age’ but he chose to round in on Robb instead, “Robb, last week didn’t you say something about waiting until marriage?”

“Well, uh, I meant that I wanted to wait until I knew it was with the right person,” he stammered, looking for the correct words, “anyway, I’m sorry for having sex with Myrcella...in your house...and my house, Mr and Mrs. Lannister,” he added awkwardly. 

Jaime nodded, seeming to accept it while Cersei stared at open space, annoyed, “Myrcella, do you have anything you’d like to tell the Starks before we leave?”

Myrcella sighed and rolled her eyes before stepping forward, she gave Cersei and Jaime a smug look, “Mr and Mrs Stark, I am sorry for taking your son’s virginity,” she said with a smirk that rivaled her mother’s. 

Jaime snapped his head in her direction while Cersei gave a self satisfied laugh and a proud look opposite Jaime’s horrified expression. 

“Catelyn, Ned, sorry to bother you over this. Thank you for allowing Jaime to...,” she hesitated looking confused at Jaime, “embarrass our kids. Have a nice night,” Cersei said as she pulled Jaime out the door, Myrcella following behind. 

The car ride home was awkward and quiet. Jaime couldn’t believe Myrcella took Robb’s virginity; he also couldn’t believe Cersei seemed proud that she did. Once they got home, Myrcella made a beeline to her room and locked herself there, hoping to avoid anymore odd encounters with her parents. 

Jaime threw himself down on the couch and stared at the ceiling. He couldn’t believe his little girl wasn’t a little girl anymore. She had done the deed, multiple times apparently AND CERSEI HAD KNOWN. 

Cersei made her way over to him and sat down straddling his waist before leaning down to kiss him. Tongue had connected to tongue and his hands were groping her bottom before he pulled his head away to pout. 

Cersei rolled her eyes, “what’s the issue?”

“You knew she was having sex and didn’t tell me,” he said somewhat upset she hadn’t let him in on the secret. 

Cersei climb off of him and sat at the end of the couch, “Don’t do this. I didn’t get pissy when you knew Tommen was having sex and chose to keep it from me. Myrcella has my trust and I have her trust, by telling you I betray that and she never tells me anything again. I handled it. And look at how you reacted.”

“Okay. I’m not mad at you. I’m mad at the situation,” he sat up to look her in the eye, “that’s my baby girl, she’s not supposed to be old enough to have sex. It doesn’t sit right with me.”

She cuddled up to his side and placed a kiss on his shoulder, “It should make you uncomfortable. I remember when my dad found out we were having sex.”

Jaime gave a sad smile, “I remember that too. Every time he saw me he looked like he was going to kill me. I wasn’t allowed to come over for a month until Bronn finally convinced him I wouldn’t sleep with you if I stayed the night.”

“Even then he still made you sleep in the guest quarters. I’d bet a fortune he would still make you sleep in the guest quarters if we were to visit now.”

Jaime moved to lay down again and pulled her down with him, “Haha. You’re so funny,” he said sarcastically before his mouth attacked hers. His tongue danced around in her mouth as she grinded against him while he slid a hand up her shirt. Jaime let out a deep moan and was met with a cute whimper from Cersei. Cersei had just gotten his shirt off when they were interrupted. 

“Hey mom, dad, I just wanted to-...oh my gosh. Oh. My. Gosh.” Myrcella said covering her eyes and making her way back to the stairs. 

Cersei worked to readjust her shirt, “Wait, darling. What did you need?”

Myrcella had successfully found the stairs with her eyes covered, “Nothing. I was just going to apologize to dad for not telling him sooner. I can’t believe you’re about to have sex ON THE LIVING ROOM COUCH.” She yelled sprinting to her room. 

Jaime rubbed Cersei’s hips, hoping to entice her to rejoin him, “I’m glad she came to apologize but I don’t know why she’s being so dramatic. It’s not like she hasn’t walked in on us in a lot less, doing a lot more.” 

That earned him a slap on the chest before Cersei stood and pulled him to their bedroom.


	18. The Gift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mid 40s, Myrcella and Tommen are teenagers.

Jaime woke up early and sneakily got out of bed. He placed a quick kiss on Cersei’s forehead before going to find Tommen and Myrcella. He found both of them in the kitchen scheming. 

Tommen looked up surprised, “Dad! Good morning!” he said whisking a strange concoction in a bowl. 

“Son. Hi. What are you guys up to?”

Myrcella and Tommen shared a look, “Well, we kind of forgot to get mom a gift for Mother’s Day soooo we’re attempting to make breakfast,” Myrcella answered quickly. 

Jaime sat at a barstool and watched them frantically attempt to cook, “I got her a gift,” he said smugly. 

Tommen smirked at him, face covered in flour, “Congrats, you got your wife a gift but did you remember to get grandma a gift?”

Jaime’s face dropped and eyes widened, “Of course I got MY mother a Mother’s Day gift. I’m not a heathen,” he lied before quickly texting Tyrion. 

“You didn’t get her a gift, did you?” Tommen asked with a laugh. 

“We got grandma a gift,” Myrcella said just as smugly as her dad had. 

“It’s a good one too. It’ll make her gardens look even more beautiful than they already are,” Tommen added staring at Jaime with a tight smile. 

Jaime looked between his children, “Okay. Okay. I’ll cut you a deal. Clean this mess and let me put my name on your gift to my mom and I’ll let you put your names on my gift to your mom, deal?”

“Like it was a collective effort from all? Sounds nice, what do you think Cella?”

“That does sound nice but we might need a little more incentive. Mom would forgive us after seeing our efforts in the kitchen. Grandma won’t forgive you so easily. I’m thinking we extend our curfews for a month?”

“Do you want to have a father on Father’s Day because your mother will kill me if I lengthen your curfews.”

Tommen sat down next to him, and threw an arm around his shoulder, “Maybe but I feel like this could benefit her as well. We’re always walking in at the worst time for you. A 1 am curfew would fix that.”

“Midnight to 1, I think we can pull that.”

Cersei walked in and wrapped her arms around Jaime and rested her head on his, “What do you think we can pull?”

“Good morning sleeping beauty, we can discuss that later,” he said looking between Tommen and Myrcella, “Right now, WE have something for you.”

Jaime led them to the living room before he went downstairs to fetch her gift. 

“So this one is what the sky looked like the night Tommen was born. The star alignments, the moon positioning. Earth’s tilt on the axis. The whole nine yards,” he said as he showed Cersei and kids the map. 

Jaime nodded excitedly and unveiled the second one, “This one is from the night Myrcella was born.”

Myrcella and Tommen looked at him blown away, yeah he always gave their mother incredible gifts but this one was thoughtful and had great meaning. They were impressed and just as surprised as Cersei. 

Cersei hugged both Myrcella and Tommen, “I love it! You guys did great!” She pecked both of them on their foreheads, “my sweet babies.”

Myrcella and Tommen hugged her back, “We love you, mom! Glad you loved your gift!” They both added before going to their rooms to get dressed for the day. 

Jaime sat down next to Cersei and she eyed him knowingly. She leaned on him and he pulled her into his lap. 

“I love them, Jaime.” She said with a gleaming smile. 

“I love you, Cersei.” He replied before kissing her, “I have one more gift for you. It’s upstairs,” he said as he pulled her up and led her to their room. 

“The gift is in here?” She said unbelieving with an eye roll. 

“Yeah, right here,” he said as he pulled her down on his lap and attacked her neck with his mouth. 

He laid her down before slowly stripping her then kissing up her body. 

He nipped at her neck before sliding his hand down to rub her clit, “You’re the perfect mother,” he whispered huskily in her ear. 

“God, Jaime,” she moaned as he pumped his fingers in and out of her. 

He picked up the pace and it drove her mad until she was scratching at his back, begging for release which he finally provided as she whimpered into his neck. 

He kissed her forehead, “Happy Mother’s Day, baby mama,” he said as he got up and licked his fingers before winking at her.


	19. Scary Stories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tommen and Myrcella are like 7 and 6 here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys! I would like to apologize for not updating either story recently; I’ve been lacking in the creative writing department. I hope you all enjoy this and are staying safe!

Jaime had just walked through the door when the grandfather clock sounded off, indicating that it was 10:00. He had been at work all day and on top of performing two surgeries, he had dealt with the board of directors over funding for a greater part of the day. He was exhausted and was anticipating a shower and cuddling with Cersei. 

He was making his way upstairs when he heard two sets of feet paddling down the hallway, “Daddy!” Tommen and Myrcella yelled in sync as they both collided with him as he reached the second floor. 

Jaime bent down to pick them up, “How are my two favorite kids?”

Tommen looked at him, confused, “We’re your only two kids.”

Jaime laughed as he carried them towards their rooms, “Shouldn’t you guys be in bed?” He asked as he rounded the corner and Cersei collided with his chest, “Oh, hi,” he said looking down before pecking her forehead. 

“Hi. Yes, they should be in bed,” she answered as she looked back and forth between the two. 

“But mom, we just wanted to see dad,” Myrcella whined. 

Tommen nodded along, “Yeah, and maybe get a bedtime story?” he asked both of his parents with puppy dog eyes. 

“Yeah, mom, they just want a bedtime story,” Jaime said with his best imitation of Tommen’s begging expression. 

Cersei rolled her eyes, “Fine but you get to tell it,” she said poking Jaime in the ribs before walking to their room. 

“Alright. Pick a room and I’ll meet you there once I get changed, deal?” He asked Tommen and Myrcella. 

They both hopped out of his arms and yelled deal as they made their way to Tommen’s room. 

Jaime tugged off his tie and slid off his dress shirt as he made his way through his and Cersei’s room. He found her finishing up her face routine. He pulled her to his chest and kissed her cheek, “Are you going to be joining us for story time?”

Cersei turned in his arms, “Wouldn’t miss it,” she said as she kissed him and walked away. 

——————

About 15 minutes later, Jaime finally made his way to Tommen’s room. There he found Cersei leaning against the headboard with Myrcella in her lap and Tommen leaning into her side. 

Jaime picked up Tommen and put him in his lap as he snuggled in next to Cersei, “Alright. What kind of story are we thinking, punks?”

“Something scary!” “The hash slinging slasher!” They both squealed at the same time. 

Tommen gave Myrcella a raised brow and confused look, “The hash slinging slasher is from Spongebob, Cella, not dad.”

“Oh, right,” Myrcella said with an adorable look of realization. 

“Okay, something scary, let me think,” Jaime said while Cersei peered up at him, hoping he had the right mind to make it lighthearted and not actually scary. 

“Alright. Alright. This is one your mother, uncles, and I used to hear all of the time.”

Cersei stared at him, already knowing what story was coming, “No, they’ll be up all night.”

“No. “Mom, we’ll be fine.” “We’re not chickens.” They both began to whine and argue with her. 

“They’ll be fine, babe,” Jaime said brushing her off, “It was a dark stormy night and two teenagers were headed home from a date. It was late, they were about to miss curfew when the boy quickly decided to take a shortcut to save some time-“

“What was the boy’s name?” Myrcella asked, very concerned with the details, “let’s name him after you,” she excitedly added. 

Jaime paused, “uhh, okay. So Jaime decided to take a short cut that he thought would get them home quicker. The girl thought it was a stupid idea. She thought they should take the easier but much longer way home, especially with the bad weather that was coming.”

Tommen shifted in his lap, “Was the girl mom?”

Jaime stopped again, “Sure, the girl can be named after mom, I guess.”

“You guess? What? Are you dating other girls now?” Cersei jokingly asked. 

“What? No. Oh my gosh, let me continue the story.”

“So they’re driving down the backroads trying to get home when suddenly the radio stops and is interrupted with a news update. Apparently an inmate had broken out of a prison not far from them-“

“Broke out like Sirius Black?” Tommen asked while grabbing his mom’s hand. 

“Probably more like Bellatrix,” Cersei answered with a lazy smile as she laid her head on Jaime’s shoulder. 

Jaime laughed, “Anyway, Cersei starts freaking out. ‘What if he’s hiding out in these woods? What do we do if we see him?’” He added with his best impersonation of a frantic Cersei. 

Cersei scoffed at this and the kids laughed, knowing their mother would never actually react like that. 

“Jaime finally gets her to calm down and reassured her that they’re nearly home when they hear a loud BANG” he shouted, resulting in Tommen and Myrcella both jumping. 

Tommen looks at him concerned, “oh no. Is it the escaped man?”

“Jaime pulls the car over once he realizes lights on the dashboard flashing. ‘We might have a flat tire,’ he told Cersei, who rolled her eyes and started her I told you so rant,” this earned him an actual eye roll, “Jaime hopped out to check on the tire. A few minutes later, Cersei was startled by a tapping on her window, she jumped back, only to realize it was a soaking wet Jaime. He said the tire was completely busted and he didn’t have a spare but there was a store about a mile ahead he could run to and get some help. He asked if she wanted to come with him but she decided to stay in the car, not wanting to get wet or leave the car.”

“Dad, why don’t they have cell phones?”

“This is set in a time before cell phones.”

“I bet grandma Jo was mad you were late,” Myrcella yawned. 

“Cells, the story isn’t real,” Tommen retorted in a superior tone. 

“These characters are idiots,” Cersei chimed in before he could continue. 

Jaime facial expression told her she could tell the story next time, before he continued, “so Jaime started the trek to the store while Cersei stayed in the car. About 30 minutes had passed and she was getting bored so she decided to take a little nap, surely Jaime would wake her when he got back. She turned the radio down a little and passed out. She woke up around 2 to a weird tapping outside the car; she brushed it off, turned up the radio and rolled over. She was awoken again at 4 by a loud knock at the back door; she figured Jaime was back and was trying to scare her so she turned up the music and rolled over. She was woken up a final time as the sun was beginning to rise and concern was also rising. She knew Jaime should be back by now, they should be at home in bed right now. There was weird scratching noise that continued to get louder and more persistent with every passing minute.”

“Well, that’s annoying.” Myrcella commented. 

Tommen looked at his parents with wide eyes, “what’s the noise?”

Cersei shrugged her shoulders and Jaime continued, “The sun was fully risen when she finally got outside of the car. She look around in front of her and everything seemed fine. A giant gust of wind blew through and the scratching noise she had heard had gotten louder. She looked up at the trees and saw it,”

“WHAT? WHAT DID SHE SEE?” Tommen yelled, on the edge of his seat. 

Jaime leaned in for dramatic effect and whispered, “she saw Jaime upside down in the tree, his fingernails were scraping the top of the car. The escaped man had gotten him before could get to the store for help.” 

Myrcella tucked her head under Cersei’s chin, “oh no.”

Tommen was shocked, “What happened to her?”

Cersei answered this time, “some say she’s still alive, roaming around the woods. Others think the escaped prisoner killed her before she could scream at the sight of Jaime.”

The kids sat in silence for a minute content and safe on their parents’ laps while Cersei and Jaime shared sly smiles. 

“But that was a lie, right? That wasn’t actually real?”

“I’m not sure. It’s a story your Grandpa Tywin used to tell us.”

“Alright. It’s 11:00, it’s way past bedtime,” Cersei said standing up with Myrcella, “let’s go!”

Myrcella clung to Cersei as she made her way out of Tommen’s room, “Wait! Can I sleep with Tommen?”

Tommen, already tucked into bed, “Please, can she?” He asked quickly, “not because I’m scared but because I don’t want her to be scared,” he added, nodding to his dad. 

“Fine,” Cersei said as she put her down next to Tommen, “Good night. I love you both,” she added as she kissed their foreheads. 

“I love you guys; sleep well,” Jaime said as he turned off the lights and closed the door. 

——————

Jaime and Cersei finally got settled into bed. He innocently hugged her from behind before he put a sloppy kiss on her cheek, “I love you,” he said huskily in her ear. 

She replied with a soft moan as he worked his lips down to her neck and began to slowly grind his hips against her. She held one of his hands as the other traveled up her shirt to toy with her nipples. 

He was groaning, pleadingly while she giggled as his free hand trailed down to her panty line. He rolled on top of her and rubbed his hard on against her front and gave a hot moan before he kissed her. Both tongues fought for dominance and just when he thought he had won, she bit his lip and to his surprise one of her hands reached down to stroke him through his boxers. 

“Oh Cersei,” he loudly moaned in her ear before he bit her lightly on her collarbone to keep from being too loud. 

She continued to rub him through the fabric, she nearly brought him to his climax twice and he was bucking into her eagerly before he flipped the tables and started drawing slow, long circles on her clit. She impatiently worked to get him out of his underwear while he moved his fingers at an agonizingly slow pace. 

He moaned in her mouth once he was finally free and she positioned him at her entrance, “Not yet,” he said against his mouth as he slowly pumped his fingers in and out of her. 

She let out a deep throaty moan when he traced her entrance with the tip of his dick before he thrusted himself inside of her. 

“GOD. JAIME.” she yelled as he sat the pace and sucked on her breasts. 

She was on the brink of climaxing when they were interrupted, “Mom? Dad?”

Jaime stopped mid thrust and Cersei’s eye went wide, “What’s up, buddy?” Jaime asked in strained voice. 

“Cella and I are...we want you to...can we- can we sleep with you?” He stammered out while trying to make out the shape of his parents, his eyes still not adjusted to the dark. 

A very out of breath Cersei was trying not to laugh at Jaime’s frustrated expression, “Will you give us a few minutes, sweetheart? And then we’ll come to your room.”

“Okay. Okay” he replied in a sleepy voice as he turned around and drug his stuffed lion out the door with him. 

As soon as Tommen closed the door Jaime let out the breath he had been holding. His body reacted to the loss of tension immediately and he came inside of Cersei with loud moan before falling forward to lay on her. 

“Seriously?” She asked as buried his nose in her neck. 

He started kissing her neck, “Mmhm,” he laughed as he nodded his head. 

“Jaime, get up,” Cersei said as she tried to wiggle out from under him. 

He wrapped his arms around her body, “No, I just want to cuddle. I promise,” he said as he used her boobs as a pillow. 

Cersei sighed with an annoyed look on her face, “Get. Up. You decided to tell your kids a scary story and now we have to go cuddle THEM.”

“Fine.”

He stood and pulled her up with him, “You should probably clean up first,” he teased as he redressed and strutted out of their room.


	20. No Interruption

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Initially this one was going to go in a different direction but I couldn’t bear to write it. They’re like 17-18 here. Enjoy!

Jaime was driving and Cersei was sitting shotgun as they cruised around Martha’s Vineyard in his mother’s Rover. She leaned back to admired the sunset, while he leaned back to admired her. 

“Ice cream,” she stated as she turned to look at him. 

He snapped out of his daydream, “huh?”

She placed a hand gently on his cheek, “We should go get ice cream before we go back.”

He turned his attention back to the road as her hand rested on his shoulder, “As you wish!”

Ten minutes later they were walking into a cute parlor, not far from their houses, when his phone went off, “Who is that?” 

Jaime quickly checked his phone and gave a confused look, “Umm, I don’t know the number,” he said declining it and pointing at the odd flavor combinations on the menu. 

They ended up getting relatively basic flavors; she got peppermint and he got rocky road, and they decided to take a sunset walk on the beach. 

They walked in silence for the most part, simply enjoying the view and each other’s company when Jaime tackled her. 

She squealed as they rolled around in the sand. 

“Aren’t you happy we don’t have to go back to New York until August? We get to spend the summer doing this and gallivanting all over,” he said as he placed sloppy kisses on her cheek. 

She hugged him tightly before pulling his hair and forcing him to look at her, “Let’s go swimming!” 

His wide surprised eyes stared into her wildly adventurous ones, he hesitated before he nodded and stood up and pulled her towards the water. 

“You know the houses are right over there. We could just go grab our swimsuits.”

Cersei pulled her shirt over her head and quickly stepped out of her bottoms, “or we could just do this,” and she ran into the water nude. 

Jaime sighed, “Skinny dipping?” he asked himself as he gawked at her, “okay. Yeah.”

He was quick to join her and they frolicked and wrestled around until the sun was gone and dark sky was only illuminated by the crescent moon and the tiki lights from the houses. 

They were wrestling and Jaime did a move that caused them to both go under. Cersei was the first to resurface and remained suspicious of his actions. 

“Don’t do this,” she jokingly pleaded into the dark waters, “Jaime, stop.”

She turned her back to the opened water and watched the shore. 

He jumped up behind her and engulfed her tiny frame with his bigger one while yelling gibberish. 

She screamed and playfully tried to break away from his grasp as he kissed her neck and began to feel her up. She leaned into his embrace as he fondled her breast. 

He had just worked his hand down between her legs when she asked, “Did you know this is where Jaws was filmed?” 

“Seriously? Way to kill the mood,” he said as he moved his fingers over her slit. 

She grabbed his hand, “I have a better idea” she declared as she pulled him closer to shore 

She positioned him to look out into the ocean while she stood in front of him. She pecked his nose and slowly sank down to her knees. 

She kissed down his stomach and let her tongue linger in his navel while sucking it. He put his hand on her head and slowly guided her a bit lower. When she finally reached his erect member she kissed the tip and let her lips gently suck on it. She licked up his shaft before kissing around the base. Her excited eyes met his hooded eyes for a few seconds before she took his cock into her mouth and began sucking it. 

He threw his head back and began lightly thrusting to her mouth, “Cersei, Cersei, Cersei,” he panted as her mouth worked the tip while her hands massaged the base. 

A siren went off in the distance but both chose to ignore it. Cersei loved seeing him like this and he was in too deep to pull away at this point. 

It went off again and this time was accompanied by a voice over a megaphone, “This is harbor patrol speaking. We hate to interrupt but we are here to inform you you’re breaking Cape Cod water law. The beaches and ocean are closed from dark until dawn,” Cersei slowly stood as a light was flashed on them, “Please step out of the water. Thank you.”

Cersei stayed behind Jaime and clung to him as he turned to face the officers, “Sorry, we didn’t intend to break curfew,” he sheepishly replied as an embarrassed Cersei pressed her nose into his back. 

The megaphone sounded off again, “You’re good Jaime, sometimes we all have to sneak off to get a little head,” a different voice replied. 

Cersei scoffed and Jaime looked at the light in disbelief, “Tyrion?”

“No, well yes, he’s here too but no, it’s Gerion!”

Jaime let out a breath of relief and grabbed Cersei’s hands, “Your uncle Gerion?”

“Yes” he whispered to her, “Hey! Turn that light off.” He demanded before he led Cersei to the shore. Gerion peeled out in the sand and all Jaime and Cersei heard was laughter as they drove back to the houses. 

They went to get dressed only to realize they only had underwear to put on. 

Cersei threw her hands in the air, “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“I TOLD you we should’ve just gotten our swimsuits,” Jaime hissed as he put his boxers on. 

“Let’s go,” she said as they made their trek to the houses, knowing their families would be outside and have the privilege of witnessing a semi walk of shame.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I have a few other one shots half written. I’m just struggling to find inspiration; is there anything specific you guys would like to read?


	21. You and I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They’re like 17-ish here.

Jaime awkwardly knocked on the door. He had rarely entered through the front door of his parents’ house so this was something new. He stood outside for about 5 minutes before Bronn finally answered the door. 

“Hey! It’s about time you got here,” he said excitedly, “and you have a date? With Tarth?” he asked slightly bemused. 

Jaime and Brienne stepped into the house, “No. No. Gods, no. We’re just friends. She’s never been to a proper party.”

Brienne turned to Jaime, “I’m going to go talk to Podrick,” before awkwardly walking away. 

Bronn clapped Jaime on the shoulder before leading him deeper into the madness, “You and Cersei are fighting, I get that but you’re using Tarth to make her jealous?!”

“We are not here together. Okay? It’s not a thing. Cersei would castrate me. We were fighting, we’re kind of on a break. She’s just being a total bitch.” Jaime replied as he was took a beer from an underclassman. 

Bronn finished whatever was in his cup before seriously sighing, “Yeah, about that I need you guys to get your ducks in a row. ASAP- Wait...you guys aren’t together right now??? That explains why she’s been a total BFH; she hasn’t been getting laid on the reg.”

“Yeah, we’ve been going through it lately and then she got pissy about Brienne and I being friends yet she can hang with Oberyn and Euron and Edmund. It was getting exhausting,” Jaime ranted and raved, “What’s a BFH anyway?”

“A bitch from hell. You guys are really on a Ross and Rachel type of break? For how long?”

“No idea, it happened last weekend,” Jaime gave a small, sad smile, “It’s reassuring knowing that she isn’t getting laid on the reg without me.”

Bronn looked at him in disgust and wondered when his best friend became such a lovesick idiot, “Well, I can’t guarantee that. Her and Martell have been all over each other tonight. You gotta get your girl, bro; we can’t let Martell be my brother-in-law. 

Jaime finished another drink and shook his head, “Martell? She always told me he was just a friend. I’ll try to talk to her, okay?”

Bronn rolled his eyes as they made their way deeper into the house, “I have no idea what she’s up to and I don’t need you to ‘talk’ to her; she has a therapist for that. I need her to relax or something. Living with her has been like lodging with Satan.”

“I prefer ruler of all things evil but I guess Satan will work,” Cersei snidely commented as she walked up behind them. 

Jaime’s breath caught in his throat as her nails raked over the back of his neck, “You look good,” she said with a sinful smile. 

He leaned into her, close enough that their noses touched, and he whispered, “I know,” before he pulled away, “Whats the deal with you and Martell?”

“You and I,” she motioned between them, “technically, aren’t together, so I don’t have to tell you anything,” she smartly replied with a smirk, “Why are you here with Brienne?”

Jaime gave her a taunting look, “You and I technically aren’t together so I don’t have to tell you anything,” he mocked her. 

Bronn quickly finished his drink, “There’s a lot of tension here, sexual tension” he said with an eyebrow wag, “and it’s killing my buzz so fix it,” Bronn finished with a thumbs up before going outside. 

An intoxicated Jaime, whether it was the alcohol or Cersei he wasn’t sure, and a drunk Cersei were left in a stare down until Brienne and Oberyn found them. 

“Aye! Beer pong. Me and Cersei versus you and Jaime?” Oberyn suggested as he wrapped an arm around Cersei’s waist and kissed her cheek. She gave a childish giggle that made Jaime’s stomach churn. 

Jaime turned to Brienne who gave a determined nod, “Let’s do this, Lannister.” 

Jaime smiled, happy his friend had agreed to come to Tyrion’s little gathering, and met her hand for a high five, “Let’s go beat their asses.”

Cersei stood on the opposite side of the table and watched Jaime and Brienne interact. They worked well together, they obviously weren’t romantic towards each other but the platonic chemistry was enough to ignite a bit of jealousy in her. She knew she was being highly hypocritical in the sense that she was allowing herself to mess around with Oberyn however Jaime was forbidden from even looking at another woman. It’s not like she was going to sleep with Oberyn, he was just there to keep Jaime on his toes until they got back together. 

The beer pong series was tied 1-1 but Cersei was growing tired of this game. She eyed Jaime as he whispered something to Brienne and quickly turned to Oberyn and grabbed his hand, “help me get on the table,” she said as she kissed him and then drunkenly climbed up. 

Jaime watched it all play out and he shook his head, “What is she doing?” He whispered to himself as he watched her stand on the table and start swaying to the beat. 

Oberyn watched her in awe as Jaime shook his head and walked away, much to Cersei’s dissatisfaction. 

Cersei was handed another shot as she danced above everyone and was on the brink of blacking out when Bronn and Tyrion managed to get her down. Bronn tossed her over his shoulder as she whined and turned Tyrion, “What room should I put her in?”

Tyrion hesitated, this was a question for Jaime, who he quickly flagged down, “Brother! What room should we put Cersei in?”

Jaime was less than pleased, they were broken up, she was down Martell’s throat all night, she wasn’t his problem right now, “She’s really not my responsibility tonight. She has a room; put her in there, I guess,” he said dismissively. 

As time went on Jaime managed to get a bit drunker so it was no surprise when Ellaria approached him, he took what was offered. He knew it would piss Cersei off to no end so he dove in head first. The kiss was odd, not near as smooth and practiced as it was with Cersei, but he blamed it on the alcohol. He led her up the stairs to his room. They only broke the kiss to giggle as he struggled to open the door. 

Once he opened the door, his lips reconnected with hers as he walked I backwards. He immediately stumbled over a shoe, he broke the kiss and bent down to pick it up. A size 7, he only knew one girl who owned that particular shoe in a size 7. He glanced around and realized his closet was opened and there was a lump on his bed. He quickly ushered Ellaria back out the door. 

She pleaded to be let back in but Jaime quickly found an out as he noticed Oberyn stumbling down the hall, “Martell, come here!”

“Lannister, have you seen Cersei?”

“I haven’t but you and Ellaria know each other. Go hang out,” that was all he said as he pushed them towards each other and quickly retreated back into his room. 

He quickly composed himself and made his way over to the bed, yanked the cashmere blanket up to reveal Cersei, “What?” She asked in a sleepy haze with closed eyes. 

“What are you doing,” He whispered fiercely, “I was about to get laid. Why are you in here?”

She signed and gave pout as she sat up to reach for the blanket, “This is my room,” she replied as she snatched the blanket out of his grasp, “What do you mean you were about to get laid?” she grumbled with a tinge of jealousy in her now alert eyes. 

He smiled when he noticed she was wearing one of his shirts, which explained the ransacked closet and she wasn’t necessarily wrong, while she did have a guest room here most of her nights were usually spent in bed next to him. He shook those thoughts out of his mind, “Did I stutter? You and I aren’t together. I WAS going to sleep with someone.”

Cersei snorted, “Who? Brienne?”

Jaime gave a devious smile and shook his head, “Ellaria.”

Cersei’s hand connected with his cheek and a loud clap filled the silent room, she was in the motion to backhand his other cheek but he quickly counteracted her and was able to pin her down on the bed. 

“Let go of me,” she demanded as she squirmed underneath him. 

“Never,” he breathed in her ear, “we need to sort this out,” he let go of her and stood up, “tomorrow. Right now, I’m going to sleep.” He added as he walked to his closet and changed. 

He walked back over to the bed only to find Cersei laying in the middle of it, engulfed by a blanket. He laid down and used his body to move hers, “Scoot over.”

Cersei attempted to hold her ground, “Stop.”

“No, move. This is my bed,” Jaime fought as he tried to push her over. 

“Stop.” “Fine.” They yelled simultaneously as they both gave up. Cersei laid there, fuming, staring at the ceiling while Jaime rested his head as close to hers as he could, hoping to annoy her. 

“I hate you.”

“There is a pit of hatred that’s boiling inside of me and it burns only for you.”

They glared into each other’s eyes before their mouths connected for a long passionate kiss. 

Cersei was awoken the next morning to Jaime snoring and drool threatening to make its way from his mouth onto her cheek. She thrusted her elbow into his rib, “WAKE UP” she said harshly. 

Jaime opened one eye, “Shut. Up.” 

“Let go of me. You and I are not together.”

“Yes, you and I are,” he held her tighter, “This break is over. I won’t hang out with Brienne but you can’t hang out with Edmund or Euron and if I see you so much as smile at Oberyn I will not hesitate to knock out every tooth he has. Now go back to sleep.”

He kissed her head as a sly smile of content etched its way onto her face before she allowed a second round of sleep to take over.


	22. Craving You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You get to meet baby Jo!

Cersei tossed and turned as she attempted to fall back into what was sure to be a restless sleep. She looked to her left and saw Jaime sleeping peacefully while she was miserable and bound to pop any day. She envied him; he got all the good parts of the pregnancy; he could still drink, he got 8 hours of undisturbed sleep, he was getting laid multiple times a day, and he didn’t gain weight. She let out a frustrated groan before rolling out of bed. Her massive baby bump caused her to waddle through the house as her feet quickly led her to the kitchen.

“What are you hungry for” she asked the baby aloud as she raided through the kitchen, “Pickles, pickles sound nice,” she answered herself as a matter of fact. 

She rummaged through the refrigerator and finally found a pickle jar, “Jaime” she cursed as she fished the sole pickle out and ate it. Her thoughts quickly went to tonight’s dinner, eggplant parm, one of her favorites. 

“Of course he made my favorite meal after he ate all of my pickles, hell of an apology,” she said to herself as she heated up the leftovers. 

While she waited for the food to heat, she felt Joanna kick. She began to rub her stomach, “Hi, sweetheart, mom knows you’re awake. You’re considerate father ate all of the pickles so I hope you’re in the mood for eggplant.”

She pulled the dish from the microwave and moved to the living room to eat. She took a bite and the savory goodness made her tilt her head back and let out a low moan, “God, this is better than sex.”

“Even when it’s with me? Jaime asked as he descended down the stairs. 

“Without a doubt. As much as your eggplant satisfies me in the bedroom, it’s so much better in the kitchen,” she said teasingly. 

Jaime snorted, “I’ll keep that in mind.”

She shifted and allowed him to sit beside her. They sat in quiet content, the only noise being Cersei and her eggplant parm. 

Jaime placed a hand on her baby bump, “She hasn’t been quiet all night and if you wait a few more seconds she’ll kick,” Cersei said with a mouthful. 

Jaime smiled as Joanna kicked, “Is that all you got up for?” he asked motioning towards the now empty plate. 

She gave him a pointed look, “Well, actually we wanted pickles but for some reason we’re out?” she faked confusion, “but yes, the cravings. They’ve gotten weirder over time, with Myrcella all I wanted was watermelon and jalapeños and Tommen was chocolate pudding with saltine crackers. Joanna only want pickles and eggplant.”

“Great, Jo likes weird foods,” he laughed. 

“She needs to chill. This amount of garlic and vinegar consumption can’t be healthy. Why are you up?”

Jaime pulled her into his lap, “I,” he began to kiss her neck, “have my own cravings,” he whispered. 

Cersei smiled and he pulled her on top of him so she straddled his waist. Over the years, they have found that pregnant sex is a lot easier if Cersei is on top. It’s not their favorite position but it gets the job done. 

Their lips stay locked as Jaime works her out of his shirt she’s wearing. He sighs in relief when she finally gets his boxers slid down. He’s erect and ready to go, much to her delight.

“Didn’t you say something about my kitchen eggplant being better than my bedroom eggplant?” he joked as he began to stroke her with two fingers. 

He pulled his fingers out and replaced it with something a bit bigger. She began to slowly ride him as he sucked on her breasts. She suddenly let out a pained gasp and pulled his hair, “I knew you were wet but I didn’t think that would happen so quickly.” 

She let out an agonizing, “No,” before catching her breath, “Joanna, said no.”

He pulled back and gave her a question look, “What?”

“My water just broke,” she said urgently. 

They quickly untangled themselves and Jaime sprung into action as Cersei attempted to clean herself up. Contractions would begin soon and she would like to be at the hospital before that happens. Jaime had managed to alert both Tommen and Myrcella while grabbing the hospital bag. He led her to the car and they headed out. 

Cersei worked on steady breathing in the backseat on the way there. 

“You know this will be a cool story to tell her.”

“What do you mean?” she asked through clinched teeth. 

“I mean, ‘hey, Jo, you’re mom was craving eggplant but your dad was craving her so he gave her his eggplant but you decided to be a cock block’. It’ll be funny,” he said as Cersei glared at him from the backseat.


End file.
